when you share you have to relive it. If something is ugly enough, you want to stuff it back and hide from it and run a million miles away. That doesn't work though, because if it is ugly enough it eats away at you from the inside out. You may not know it is doing damage until you try to escape into yourself or try to escape from life. It is really hard to get over violent traumatic things because you suffer a post traumatic stress. It is really hard to learn to trust again. Not putting yourself in a stressful situation and just taking it slow until trust returns is good. If you have a good man, it does the trust will return. Dealing with the pain is the other thing that has to be done. Not by someone religious necessarily. Someone who is a good shrink. Talk, and talk and talk until you have talked about all of the pain. Let it out and let it go until there isn't anymore left inside. Talk and cry and let someone validate your feelings until you don't have anymore to say. Your not a bad person. Bad things happened to you that should not have happened and if you don't keep it inside and you let a relationship happen slowly and naturally without the pressure of more than you can handle faster than you can handle it then you will learn to trust again. You will learn to trust others and yourself. It happened for me, I believe it can happen for you.
