From Argyll:
Quote:
Suppose, for instance, that after 15 years of marriage you are no longer the same person you were intellectually as you were when you got married. And suppose further, that you met someone of the opposite sex who had some of the same passions and intellectual interests as you. There could be a possibility of things developing there, right?

I feel that some of these changes in the individual can take some time to come about. It can happen to any couple living together for a long time, married or not.

Does that make sense?
Yes, I can see that. And it is a sad scenario, but probably not uncommon. To me, that is the story of 2 people who have fallen out of love. In that particular instance - if 2 people are truly no longer in love, or no longer share the same hopes and vision of the future, then I would not advocate staying together just for the sake of staying together... or "for the kids" for that matter. That is probably why many people get divorced, and it is depressing.
Although it could happen to anyone - I tend to think that it happens to people who had some tragic flaw with the marriage to begin with. That's just a guess on my part - but it seems like there must have been some difference or lack of something that the couple was willing to overlook initially, and then that little something just got bigger and bigger. Or, perhaps, the couple got married for some superficial reasons or conveniences without thinking through the long term compatability. Of course, its possible for people to just grow apart - but most day to day differences can be worked out by committed compatible partners.

Nonetheless - now I think we are talking about 2 different animals. One is a couple that has fallen out of love and does not see a future together. Answer = Divorce. NOT CHEATING.
The other scenario - of the cheating partner - has more to do with a couple that probably still loves each other, has no real intention for divorce, and yet somebody has a secret affair - for lust, adventure, boredom, or even ideas of "love" for another - yet they really don't want to give up their partner. To me - that is lack of self control, and if you love your partner, and are committed to your partner, you should not allow yourself to go down that pathway at all. You'd stop it before it got that far.

Back at ya: Does that make sense?