PDM - I tried to send you a PM. Evidently I can't do that. I could get a lot more specific about things but as you can likely tell I am being vague on purpose - lacking specific pronouns etc.
The internet is such a public forum, I am scared to post a lot of specific details.
I can say that I don't think my SO is nearly as concerned about my friendships as I am with some of theirs.
Not sure if this is just because they are not quite as insecure as I am, or if it's because they are so caught up in maintaining their own personal freedom they're not going to question mine in fairness.
I would likely say that my SO would be the type of person who truly believes you cannot control another person. Basically if one of us were to be unfaithful, that would be the fact of the matter and we would have to decide how to handle that when the situation came to light. Until then, it's unimportant especially in terms of letting our insecurities make each other uncomfortable.
SO knows how I feel about one of these situations. That to me should spill over into any similar.
I am willing to do whatever it takes to make my relationship work - but I also hate the thought of having the wool pulled over my eyes. This is the other piece of what makes me insecure. The fear of my feelings being trifled with.
I think where we honestly would reach an impasse is in dealing with a specific situation such as:
I personally think it's disrespectful to my relationship to go out, one on one, with someone who I have any reason to believe would prefer we were dating and they want to spend any time at all with me because of that - OR to allow them to make any advances towards me be it what I would normally consider harmless flirting or more...
but I think my SO may see it more as hanging out with a friend and I have no control over their feelings so why should I not spend time with them? It's them, not me and besides that it's kind of nice to feel that I am attractive and worthy of the attention of someone other than my mate. Since I know I am in control of my feelings and actions and will not betray my current relationship, what's the harm?
