Hi & welcome bluspeed51
I know that, sometimes, when girls & boys are missing their partners, they may find solace in the arms of someone else.
Sometimes the partner can accept it and sometimes s/he can't.
A kiss can be many different things at the same time.
It can say Happy Birthday, or Merry Christmas, without indicating anything further.
It can say I love you, or I lust after you.
It can say that, in spite of 'being taken', I really like you, and I have weakened to allow this to happen, but I won't let anything more happen between us.
In this case she spends an evening chatting to another man.
She then accepts an invite to go back to his place.
She knows that she has been drinking, and is in another man's home at night, but she continues to drink.
She goes into this man's bedroom.
Instead of heeding her friend's advice, about it being inadvisable to be in this man's room, she shouts at her.
Her friends go home in a taxi, but, instead of going with them, she stays, alone with this man, in his apartment, at night.
You guess, but don't know, that the kiss was a result of this man comforting your girlfriend after the argument.
They then 'make out' ~ which can cover all sorts of behaviour, while one is kissing ~ but she suddenly realises that this isn't right and stops, which shows that she didn't want to hurt you.
She probably feels guilty for various reasons.
Going out with friends, drinking, is something a lot of girls do, and she was probably missing you, especially as her girl-friend was part of a couple, so it is understandable.
Going back to this chap's home was not a great idea, but at least she was with friends.
This is where things become a bit confused for me ~ and maybe for her.
The couple was going to stay in the spare room ~ where was your girlfriend going to sleep?
I suppose that I can understand her becoming angry, if her friend was insinuating that something untoward might happen, but, after all, she was alone in his bedroom, with him, at night, which was unwise.
And then the friends went home; why did they leave her alone, drunk & vulnerable with this man ~ and why did she stay alone, at night, with him, when she could have left with them?
OK, girls may be vulnerable to a kiss, when they feel low, but she stayed the night ~ again unwise, but it would have probably been unwise to venture out alone at night, too.
There was a spare room ~ did she sleep there, or in his bed?
He kissed her & they made out for a while, but then did 'nothing else' because she felt guilty.
'Nothing else' other than what, exactly?
Nothing other than a peck on the cheek, or lips?
Nothing other than prolonged 'French kissing', which involved no cuddling?
Or was there cuddling?
And touching?
Were they in his bed?
Were they fully clothed?
What was she feeling at the time ~ other than guilt?
She then slept there overnight.
Where? The spare room or his bed?
'The only thing they did was kiss for a little, and then she felt bad so did nothing else', but just this can cover a lot of eventualities ~ whatever they were, can you accept and get over them?
This may have been a little more than a brief chaste kiss, but if you can still forgive and forget, then there is still hope for you. However, you need to understand & accept the full import of what has happened ~ as she has ~ before you can get your relationship back on an even keel.
I'm not trying to stir up negative feelings, just to get you to really understand why your girlfriend is saying these things, like
'she doesn't deserve me, and that I can do much better'.
She was probably just missing you & got carried away.
She now feels terrible about it.
But she needs to be sure that, if you are going to forgive & forget, you actually understand what it is that you are forgiving, and that this matter won't raise its ugly head in the future.
You need to have a long chat with her and really discuss how you both feel and what you can both do to make your relationship succeed.
If you both love each other, you can face the reality of this and come through it.
You sound like an understanding person, who really cares for her. She needs to accept this and forgive herself if you can forgive her.
Good luck!
