Should I move and leave my love behind?

Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
I have a problem that I haven't seen on your website.I am having problems with my job and I have come to the point that I don't want to live here in this town and I want to move on,maybe further my education,find a different career,etc.I stayed here because my mother was ill and needed someone to be with her.My mother passed away suddenly in June.It has been difficult for me in that I was the one who found her.I have been with a man now for awhile.We have started getting closer since my mom died.He has been very good to me and we both love each other very much.When I told him that I want to quit my job and move somewhere else,he became upset with me.I told him that we can start a new life together,but,he doesn't want to.He has family and friends here and feels like he is too old to change(I'm in my 40's and he is in his 60's).I don't want to leave him behind in that I love him very much and would miss him!I feel so torn! A part of me wants to stay with him and another part wants me to go and live my life! Do you have any advice? Thank you!! Advice
Since your boyfriend is certain that he doesn't want to leave his family and friends, you would have to move by yourself and probably lose the relationship you have with him. On the other hand, if you stay with him, you stand a better chance of keeping him. The choice is really yours.

Keep in mind that if you move, you can always move back if things don't work out to your satisfaction. Likewise, if you stay, that doesn't mean you can't move in the future.

One thing is probably certain, and that is your boyfriend, at age 60, is not going to pack up and leave his familiar surroundings.

Best wishes,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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