Trying to prove you love someone
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
My girlfriend doesn't always believe me when I tell her that I love her more than anything and that I want to spend the rest of my life with her. What are some ways that I can prove to her that I DO love her and want to spend the rest of my life with her?
A relationship is all about trust and communication. Something is not right here if you are saying something very clearly to her and she is saying "Nope, you're lying to me." In essence that's what she's saying. You should NOT have to prove your love to her. You've already told her and undoubtedly shown her through your words and actions. If she refuses to believe it and wants you to start jumping through hoops, it sounds like she's insecure and can't believe that she is worthy of someone caring that much.
This is of course assuming that you do show your love for her by treating her well, being proud in front of your family and friends, all of that. Those are the ways you show love, not with gifts and trinkets.
So assuming you do show your love for her, you need to sit down with her and discuss this. Love is a very personal, very communication-based thing between two people. It's based on respect and trust. Ask her why she doesn't trust you, why she doesn't believe you, and what she feels is wrong with the relationship. And listen to her answers. This is something you two need to work out now. But if it comes down to her insecurities, and a need for you to *prove* your love like some knight going around killing dragons, that is something she needs to work on. Love isn't about doing great deeds. It's about being open, being honest, being reliable, talking and sharing. And for her, it's about believing in you.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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