ok me and my ex split up about 7 weeks ago but lately i have been getting alot of advice from relationship books saying to not contact her in 4 weeks to make her miss me i have also started dating again but last nigt she inboxed my mother saying she was happy i have found sum1 new she then inboxed me a little while later but i don't know what to do next my plan has clearly worked and she is intrested again what should i do

Hello Craig

I'd be wary of laying plans like this, where relationships are concerned.

Your ex ~ Is she getting back in touch because she wants to get back together, or because she feels that enough time has elapsed for you to just be friends now?

After all, she said that she was pleased that you had found someone else.

Are you still dating the 'someone new'?

Did you date someone else because you liked that person, or just to make your ex jealous?

pretty much to make her jealous av tried everything else to get her back

i have decided to leave it now with my ex i found out she had found someone else so why waste my time chasing a girl hu dusnt give a [censored]

But you have to consider that you dated someone, about whom you didn't care, just to make someone else jealous.
That wasn't fair, was it?

Have you sorted things out with this girl now?
It is not right to mislead her.

And this other girl didn't mislead you ~ she said that she was happy that you had found someone new.

Hopefully this was a good learning experience for you.

the girl i took out on a date new we where just going as friends i didnt tell her about my ex
my ex is just a heartless she devil and a spoilt brat because she couldnt control me and could not get her own way all the time she left i gave tha girl alls i could an she spat it bck in my face i hope the new guy sees her for what she is and telling someone whos in love with you i just want us to be friends make them feel 10x worse can you guys give me anytips on how to forget about the ex and move on with my life

Hello craig

When a break-up occurs, it is always a good idea to treat it as a bereavement and to allow yourself to grieve. Give yourself time for this ~ but also try to enjoy spending time with friends, or on hobbies

Whether this girl is as bad as you say, or whether you are just reacting to the situation, I don't know, but, either way, she was not the girl for you, so you will be happier finding someone new. Try to remember that and let it help you to move on.

It is sometimes possible to remain on good terms with an ex, and some people remain friends after a break up ~ but it's not for everyone.

Take care ~ time will heal

ok so my ex is still saying she loves me but i am still chasing after her alot of ppl hu i know have gotten there ex bck said that they stopped chasing and left it for a bit and the ex came back i have use this once b4 but i wernt in love with the last girl and the fort of having no contact scares me in your opinion is this a good move

Craig, I don't know whether or not she loves you. If she is as confused as you sound, then maybe she doesn't know either.

Read what you have said:



You say how bad she is, then add that you love her.
She is saying that she still loves you, but is dating someone else, it seems???

How do you know that she is saying that she loves you?

Maybe not chasing her would allow her time to really consider her feelings, without pressure, but, as I said, 'plans' to win her back may not be a good iddea. Only the way you both feel should decide that.

At the moment there is a lot of bitterness, which is not going to help matters.

Perhaps you do just need to give her some time and space ~ alternatively, you could write her a letter, explaining how you feel and why (though this could cause problems, if she still has another boyfriend).

Either option could make things better or worse, depending on the people involved.

Do you really think that she is 'a heartless she devil'?
Is she actually dating someone else?
Is she really pleased that you were going out with another girl?
Are you sure that she says that she still loves you?
Is it romantic love or friendly love?

You cannot force romantic love.
If it exists, then great.
If it doesn't, then you really just have to accept that.

If you do get back together, then you will probably need to have a good talk ~ and you will also probably need to sort out your feelings of anger etc.

well before we broke up it was very romantic then we went out and had a big fight but then seemed to make up then the nxt few days she started acting diffrent she said i didnt care about her and i have tried everything to convince her that i was sorry for the way i acted and wanted another chance

Is she actually dating someone else?
If not, or if it isn't serious, you could try writing to her.
That might help.

i dont think its serious coz little things she dose makes me seem like she still cares
il try writing her see if i get a good reaction

I got my ex back and he loves me more than ever and treat me like a queen now, thanks to the spell caster who helped me. i saw his advert in the newspapers and i sent him an e-mail, and he did a get your ex back spell for me and now it has worked, i did not need to do anything.i am the happiest woman right now.
for more details, you can e-mail me xxxxxxxxxxx

[e-mail address removed by PDM]

In my opinion, if she finds u, that means she still want together back with you.
For me, if I don't want my ex, I will not waste my time to find him.
Craig, if you really love her, don't wait for her to miss you.
coz i also just broke-up with my bf recently..
i feel i wanna find a new bf to make me forget him faster.
but i knw its not a good solution.
just now i chat with my fren in msn.. my fren said my bf is immature.. that makes me feel better now.. i don't love him anymore >.<
i shouldn't choose immature guy as my ex.. also he is 3 years younger than me..
i knw age doesnt matter.. but i mind i'm old faster than him >.<

i think persistence may be paying off we have started talking more and i have decided i am not going to give up on this girl

my boyfriend broke up with me back in september. and i was devastated, he did it out of the blue. I had no idea it was coming. i had no contact with him for two months. then i started dating, but just going out with friends no intimate stuff. and now he's contacting me again. which im loving, but i fell into his arms this past wednesday and he hasnt called me since. but he has messaged me on facebook. i dont know what to think. i love him so much, but i dont want to allow him to play with me. if he wanted to get back together, i'd jump at the chance. i dont know what to do??

it's hard to find some1 who really love u and u have the same feeling towards her..
all da best craig..
i've found this website
i think it is useful
20 ways to making it last forever!
http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveDtl/22011
and i knew the reason y i broke up
coz tips no.15
DON'T BE JEALOUS- If your a jealous person, work on it! No relationship will ever work if your constantly jealous of each others friends, family, or accomplishments!

i jealous coz my ex told wadever prob to another girl..he said he theats her like a sis.. grr..
im just a gf who knw nth about him.. of coz im angry..

it's hard to knw whether he's playing or serious..
u must try to feel it yourself..
but i think if u really love him.. don waste the chance.. gv a try..
can i know what makes u think he is playing?

ok so here is my latest conversation with my ex

me: wana come and have a talk then ashley
ex: no craig it will just make things harderrr
me: how can it make things any harder we never sat down an talked about anything that happend we just ended it......its only a talk ashley no arguing or nothing like that i just wana talk
ex: noo craig
me: i know ye must still be feeling bitter towards me ashley and the way i acted that night in town am not surrprised, i feel really guilty because i know it was my fault that we split up, me acting jealous over stupid things caused me to lose my best friend and the only girl i have ever loved, ashley i now there are no words to make up for the way i acted so alls i can say is am really sorry xxx

Well Craig, you have made it clear how you feel, and you have apologised for whatever you did wrong. Now you can only hope that she wants to re-kindle this as much as you do ~ but be prepared for her to continue to say no. Sometimes the reason for a break-up is not the obvious one. She may just feel that it is time to move on ~ but just see how she feels and how things go.

Good luck

Hi Mone

I think that your thoughts here may be helpful to Craig, but I also think that maybe you are asking for help for yourself?

I'll start a new thread for you
http://www.wineintro.com/forum/ubbthreads.php/topics/406539#Post406539

ok so me and my ex have started arguing i told her if she has done anthing with another guy that i didint want her back
she said i have now blew any chance i had by saying this
she then said that she just wants to be single and not have a boyfriend so i said well why dnt we just start dating again an not get into a relationship just to see how we go then she said no your a horrible [censored] leave me alone

and so they no contact plan starts again

yo crag.. how's everythg?

ur ex sounds like me -.-!!
i also told the same thing to my ex.. i wanna be single..
u knw wad.. i hate he smoke..
b4 this i wanna together back with my ex..
but he said sth that really pissed me off..
he posted this in his twitter
" if you don't love me at my worst you don't deserve me at my best"

Craig y u wanna ask her such question?
That question really made her angry because this shows that
you don't trust her..
in bf-gf relationship.. trusting each other is very important.
For me if I heard such words, I might have this tot..
1) OMG, in your heart i'm that kind of girl..?
2) u hurt me so much..
3) u broke my heart again.. i cant accept u anymore..
May I know,
1) Do you really loves her?
2) Why would you bother she has done anyth with another guy or not?
3) Do you really wanna together back with her?

Maybe you should just buy some flowers and find her .. talk face-to-face.. to try tell her something.. like
im sry ashley, i realised i cant live without you..
pls forgiv me.. i promised i will try my best to gv u happiness..

Hope it helps.

hey
yer i wont her back more than anything but i just got angry because she didn't seem to be bothered. i have asked her to come and see me but she just says no it will makes things worse, how can things possibly get any worse by cumin to see me face to face she wont even talk on the phone now

i think her friends got into her head that i was controlling her which i wasn't i always encouraged her to go out with her friends i have bought a few books on relationships an even watched films on youtube they all say the same thing when u stop chasing her they start to miss you i keep saying am guna try this but the sumthing will happen on facebook like her sisters adding me and commenting on a picture where we are both saying we love each other and i cant resist the urge to contact her

frankly speaking..
if she loves u.. really will miss..
but now i think..
she maybe really need some time to heal the wound..
u wanna wait her to miss u

OR

play safe..
MAYBE.. just maybe..
everyday find her.. but don force her..
just be nice.. show some caring is enough..
For example, early morning text to her..
just 1 simple text.. something like
i'm missing u badly..
the next day like..
plz forgive me honey..

i oso nvr talk to my ex when im angry.. i even cut his phone..
i nvr pick when im angry.. mayb she's crying?
actually last time i was crying.. and i don wanna pick his call..
how am i gonna speak when i was crying..

by that time.. 80% of my friends suggested me to broke up with him -.-!
sth like... " wan him for wad? he is immature"
"there are still a lot of guys out there.. choose another one la jess"

actually craig i feel u should learn and think carefully b4 u talk to ashley..
lols.. wanna use my ex words?
" a man shouldn't beg on a woman for her forgiveness, but y im doin this? it's because i love you jess"
but all these words were used when the 1st time we broke.. we really togethr back but then broke up again -.-!

Hope it helps.

this is the first time we have broke up the way we left it today i think i need to let it cool down for abit go out over christmas with my friends and have fun my be take my mind off of her il give it 2 weeks an try messagin her am missing her like crazy see if that helps hopefully by then there wont be bitterness

ok.. all the best craig~

hey jess so what did your ex do to make you want him again after you broke up with him

non-stop of begging..

so him begging made you want him again hmmm
me begging seemed to push her further away

Craig,

If you really love her I would suggest you not to date anybody for a while.

Let her have the feeling that you're a man enough to live your life alone.

Don't contact her for a while.
Let her beg you to contact her.

i have not contacted her in 7 days and i have also stoped dating it is in her court now i have chased enough

Hey Craig....it's very clear that you want to get your ex back If you'll take my hand, I'll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your ex lover back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... I bet you know of…or have heard of at least one girl that has taken a guy back that REALLY should not have…you know the ones I am talking about… "Couples reunite every day REGARDLESS of the situation!" There is hope... At this point, I must WARN YOU…STRONGLY WARN YOU… the advice and methods are VERY unconventional. But this system has proven itself with more than 50,000 satisfied customers. I invite you to stop in and take a look at the "Magic Of Making Up" so that you too can GET YOUR EX BACK ! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I wish you all the best !

hi top dog i actuly already have the magic of making up and it just says have no contact for 30 days and everything will be ok

ok so i went on the magic of making up website and then sent this message to my ex

ash i know we don't talk anymore but just wanted to say sorry for the way i have been acting the last couple of months and i have realised now that us splitting up was the best thing for both of us and i agree with you on everything you said. hope you have a nice christma no hard feelings x

she replyed

awwww thank you you too x

and in the book it says now don't contact for at least 4 weeks

what do you guys think

Craig, I have once be in this kind of your situation and mine was even critical than yours. But it was a guy who introduced me to a spell caster on this forum. It was this spell caster that helped me in bringing my ex back after when I have made many attempt and scammed in the process of getting her back. You can contact the man on xxxxxxxxxxx, I wish you luck.

Casting spells on people is not the way to get them to love you ~ even if they work.

Did you mean this?

no i dint mean it but on the website it says make it seem like your not intrested anymore an she will change towards me it isnt a spell caster thats just the title of his guide

Do you really think that telling her untruths is the way to get her back?

Honest, truthful communication is best in my opinion ~ but that's just my take on it.

Let us assume that this brings her back to you ~ and then she discovers that you lied to her ~ what effect do you think that this would have?

Maybe it will work ~ or maybe she is just relieved that you now agree with her re the break-up.

Good luck

ok so i got myself a new girlfriend but it feels nothing like what i had with my ex do i just stick things out an see how it gose

Are you being honest with the new girl ~ about your feelings, etc?
Are you being fair on her?
Trust and honesty are central to a successful relationship.

yer i have been pretty honest but it seems to be getting my ex's back up i really don't know what to do now

What do you actually want to do?

haha u guys wouldnt believe what happend christmas night i was out in a pub with my friends and my ex friend comes up to me and say my ex was devastated when i got in a relationship with this new girl and that i should go over and talk to her, so i go over and we talked and kissed so am thinking hey i mite be getting sumwhere here then we had a bit of a argument she said she can not be in a relationship the way shes dances when shes out with her friends :S so i ened up calling her a slapper ( which she is now in my opinion ) so she then took it upon her self to make sure i was looking then go from guy to guy kissing them so we ended up arguing again and she started crying her friends kept telling me to go up to her to try and sort things out they said she had been telling them how much she missed me long story short we ended up arguing again and she punched me then the next day we where arguing again so i just told her i dont want her back no some shes not worth it and can not be trusted

Quite an experience!

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When you see we're stopping you from doing that, please do not exacerbate the situation by trying to repeatedly do your advertising promos.

hello craig.... After a break-up most people will tell you to just do your best to move on. “There’s no use in dwelling on the past,” they say; “Look to the future!” But try as you may, the truth is that you aren’t ready to look to the future yet. In fact, you can’t seem to stop thinking about your past relationship and more importantly, what your ex might be doing now . . . First, the “bad” news… Whatever we put our attention on grows. When we think about our fears and worries all the time, they start to shape our reality. Normally, shifting our frame of mind is a difficult, but not impossible task. But after a break-up, our doubts and fears become especially sneaky and slippery, and most of us find that we just can’t seem to keep them out of our mind for very long. Unfortunately, that means that your reality is probably reflecting that (and will continue to do so until you make a change). However, there is still hope because… The good news is… When you succeed in shifting your patterns of thought (and take a few simple action steps), your reality will begin to reflect what you DO want, instead of what you DON’T want.

so what are you saying i should do i havent talked to my ex since new years eve

personally, sounds to me like you guys have a lot you need to discuss if you do want to get back together with her. The number of arguments that occured and both of your reactions to what happened over the Christmas holiday seem to show me that... but that's just an outsiders perspective looking in.

What do you want? We can't tell you that - you need to decide for yourself. Are you happier with her or without her? What makes it easier for you to sleep at night?

Who knows, if you are able to talk to her and get things sorted out you may find that gives you peace of mind and you will be better able to make the right decision for yourself - to be with her or to be without her.

I agree with MW1
Good luck

well being honest it would 100% help me sleep better if i had her back i just cnt figure out the best way to go about getting her back we just seem to try an make each other jealous all the time which in my opinion is a good sign coz if shes going out of her way to make me jealous she must still want sumthing to do with me

I think that honesty and clarity are the best policy.

Stop 'playing games', based on advice in books and on websites, and just be straightforward and truthful with her. Ask her to do likewise and have a sensible mature discussion ~ then see where it leads.

Agree PDM.

Stop trying to make one another jealous and just sit down and discuss. The whole jealous thing doesn't seem to be working.

Relationships are based on trust - you need to trust one another - and I think sitting down and talking about your feelings on both sides will really help to start fresh, whatever direction that may be.

Best of luck.

well we havent spoken since new years eve i fort i was over her but the last few days i have started thinking about her again but i dont want to be the 1 to initiate contact

Hi Craig

You need to decide, I think, whether you are going to get in touch with her, if only to gain closure, or just deal with your feelings until times helps to put them at the back of your mind.

A break-up is like a bereavement, so it will be difficult, but I really think that all the ploys that you were using, at first, just made things worse. Do you agree?

I know that you thought that you were doing the right thing ~ and that you were being advised to do this, but straightforward communication is usually the best thing.

yer i agree everything i did made things worse i am going to try and talk to her today and see what happens