I dont know what 2 do 2 myself plz plz every1 help me
my story begins when i met this guy he proposed me and expressed so much love but we used 2 talk on phone we never met just saw pix of each other later i came 2 know that he got married
and i left him and closed this chapter
after sumtym i met ths another guy again on phone and ths tym i propose him
after a week he honestly told me tht he was formerly married and has a son. I forgave him hardly, but i did and never told him about my first affair(1st guilt begins). Now he is such a darling,cares about me alot,helps me always, treats me like a princess.. I hav met his whole family and they all love me including the baby i also love him. But than he got a job which i didnt admire but due 2 his financial crisis i didnt force him 2 quit. Than we got married without telling my parents. Now i live separately here at my parents' home till i find a job and than i will go with him and he is living in his home. We live in 2 different cities so cant meet often.
Now the problem begins when i lost my virginity 2 him. I was always a di-heart romantic and sexual freak, but he got busy in his job and we couldnt meet 4 whole 2 yrs after our 1st and only sexual intercourse. I got frustrated due 2 sexual needs and he was so busy that we couldnt even talk about it often.
Than came a guy in my life who loved cum worshipped me. I fall 4 him and had sexual relations with him without telling my hubby I CHEATED MY HUBBY
i cried alot at front of him 2 give me importance, 2 cum and meet me, if not than atleast show affection via phone but he was always busy ignoring me. He wasnt cheating on me thts 4 sure coz i was continuously in touch with his family. He was just so busy in his training. I plead, i cried and than fell 4 the other guy.
Later i went 2 spend sumtym at my cousin's house and there had sexual relations with my cousin also and during ths tym i ignored my hubby so much that he started worrying and started 2 work on our relation and restored it now i have left both the guys but never told my hubby about any of them. Im afraid because he is so possesive and touchy. I dont know wot will i say 2 him how will i face him? But this guilt of hiding it is much more a burden than cheating. I want 2 tell him but i dont know what will he think i dont want 2 lose him infact i will die if he will leave me. What can i do now please help me folks im so worried. Now when he asks me "darling u r only mine na"?
I reply yes but my heart bleed due 2 my dishonesty, though im ashamed and will never do any such thing.