I'm glad that you can admit it's a weight off your shoulders though. It takes alot to do that. I salute you and wish you the best in all!
I couldn't have said it better. Hope things turn up the future.
PS
I spent my birthday this year completely alone. I decided to make the best of it anyway--made myself a cake, sang to me, "ooh"d and "aah"d at my own gifts to myself (I got me a parakeet!) While you may not go to quite the extreme, I'd recommend it over wallowing, though it is hard.