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To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. --David Viscott

She keeps playing a seesaw battle

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I recently broke up with my girlfriend I'ver lived with for a year. She was a friend of mine that i knew and she was recently divorced. She was married for 7 years. After she got divoced we hit it off and moved in together. WE had a one year contract to see how everything worked out. At the end of December she told me she cheated on me. She could never love me like that. She needed time to think. Unfortuantley I didn't give her time she didn't need any I thought. So I gave her more time. 3 weeks went by and she says she's seeing someone else. She'd writing me out of her life. Then 2 days later she told me there could be a possibility we could get back together again but not right now. The guy she's seeing isn't serious and doesn't want to be in a serious relationship right now. She told me I have to do things for myself I have to know what I want. She's very sorry that she hurt me and she can't love me the way she should because we are too different. She keeps plaing a seesaw battle she's not ruling out of her life then she is. She just wants to be friends. i know I shouldn't worry about her but I do. She might mess up her life because she can't afford to do a lot of things on her own. I was paying for a lot of things because i wanted to see her graduate collage. I just get confused because one minute she tells me it's over move on then the next she says she's not ruling things out of her life. She says I have to do things on my own and see what I want. I am very confused. Waht do I make of all this.

RomanceClass.com Advice
She doesn't know what she wants.

You would think someone who was married for seven years and is presumably maturre would have figured out more about life by now. Plus she cheated on you in less than a year's time.

You have been very patient with her and given her more space than most people would have done.

Is it possible that she had little experience in her life and now wants to see what's out there and try out new things?

It's really all up to you. Only you know how much you can take and how long you can be waiting for her.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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