I already feel like I am a fat pig
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
My husband and I have been married for 7 years, together for 10 total. We have 4 wonderful kids. About 2 weeks ago we got into a fight (which we never really do. We fight over stupid stuff nothing really big). But about a month ago he started to go to a friends house from midnight till about 4am and I have a problem with that. So after many talks asking him to stop going over and him saying no, I asked him to leave. He said he was gone and would not come back. We disscused divorce. But he decied to come back. But when he decied to come back he said that he hasn't loved me romaticly for a while, even though we had sex regularly. He said he just feels like ice when i am around. Then why would he come back? I told him if we were not going to work on this 100% then lets not do this.
He did say he has no needs or wants to be with me, both sexual and just alone time. But when I said then why are we together, he said you are my wife and we are working on our realtionship. I have asked a number of times to just leave then cause I don't want to live like this.
He found out I was talking with another guy (nothing but talk, never ever was alone with this guy, it is someone at work). I thought he was going to kill someone. I notice that he is very jelouse even though he says he's not. He says he has no problem with me going out but yet last night I went to the movies and when I got home he was gone. The babysitter asked him 50 questions, where was I, who did i go with, when did i leave, and then the sitter said he figures out that I should have been home and said two can play my game and left.
I really am not sure what to do. I love him a lot but don't want to play this game either. I also want someone who loves me and I don't have to wait for. I already feel like i am a fat pig...and now that he dosen't want to be with me. Help is it worth working on this relationship or should I move on?
Neither of you seem to be thinking of the children or the financial problems you would face if you divorced. Not to mention the ruptured relations between your two families. All of these can be devastating.
The best thing you two can do is to see a professional marriage counselor and soon. This is the way to work on your relationship in a meaningful way.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com