I don't like going ANYWHERE with him
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost five years now and he cheated on me about two and a half years ago. I forgave him but I just can't get over it. I don't like going ANYWHERE with him because I am convinced that he is looking at other women and would rather be with them then me, or else compares me with them. He tells me that if he wanted to be with someone else he wouldnt be with me. I even get severly angry at him when there is nudity in a movie or something. I am always miserable with him in public places and sometimes we get into bad arguements over my jealously. How can I stop being so jealouse and get our relationship back on track???
You are still angry and jealous because it gives you pleasure (at some level) to hold his mistake over him and make him suffer, as well as yourself.
If you are in college please go to the Student Health Center and get some counseling for your hurt. Otherwise you probably can't afford counseling and you must figure out this yourself.
My advice is to first realize that two and a half years is too long to carry a grudge. Also, imagine how you would feel if he were acting like you are. Quite frankly if it were me I would dump you pretty darn quick.
You have carried this situation so long that the only other suggestion I have is to ask yourself "Why in the heck am I still bothered by this" everytime a jealous feeling arises. Do that a 100 times or so and maybe the jealousy will give up and go away.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com