As long as he's in the marital home I would never consider anything but a platonic relationship
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
There was a mutual attraction. We had a casual lunch, and didn't see each other for three weeks. I purposely bumped into him, and asked him out. We agreed to go out. I canceled when I found out he was married. He graciously backed away.
I couldn't resist and after two weeks I contacted him and have kept e-mailing. We bump into eachother once is a while and have brief conversations. We flirt all the time. In person and on-line. We've gotten to know each other well, and as much as we like eachother, we know we can only be friends. We went out again and he asked to go out again. I agreed, but he never called to confirm.
He's been married for over 20 years. The last child recently moved out. Now he's ready to move out. I want to get to know him better but it's not the right time. I want to give him space so he can figure out what he wants. However, I like him very much and don't want to loose his friendship. I miss our chats.
How do I go about keeping in touch without appearing to be pushy? What could have caused this sudden disappearing act? It's not like we were dating or having an affair. Am I fooling myself by thinking I can be friends with a man I have strong feelings for? As long as he's in the marital home I would never consider anything but a platonic relationship. Any advice on how to proceed?
The way to proceed is to explain to him exactly what you wrote to me.
It is a fairly straightforward situation but can only be figured out by you and him. If he is a considerate person he will be happy to discuss the relationship and have important input. If he isn't considerate then you don't want to be with him anyways.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com