Looking for romance
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hi, it's Hiro again.
WOW! I did not expect an answer with such high responsiveness, thank you for replying so efficiently.
Yes..I always kinda knew there was something with my personality and "intelligence"..
When I see others, I see even the average Joe with an IQ of 100 find a great girlfriend, whereas I haven't even begun to start..thus I knew..love isn't rocket science..
However, that would lead to my next concern.
"You should be yourself."
I fear that if I be myself, I expose too many of my flaws.
Over time, I have developed a very strong persona that masks myself from the rest of the world.
At home, I'm silly, wacky and very wild, sometimes..to the point that my sisters get annoyed lol.
But when I'm around strangers (and even friends), I can fool the entire world with a well-mannered, good-natured, sweet guy mask.
It's not that I am afraid to open, in fact, I can open up almost spontaneously if the situation allows.
I'll give you an example.
I sing karaoke at home a LOT.
but I fear that I might choke in front of a stranger or even a friend..
I can't get myself to be more outgoing,
..it's almost like I have a fail-safe mechanism that prevents me from making a fool out of myself.
I know they might not mind..but I just have trouble overcoming it.
I had wanted to ask a girl to the prom before, but I gave up then and there.
I didn't want to show my dance moves, if I had any.
It's strange, I don't mind touching a girl's hand when navigating a mouse with her..so it's not so much an intimacy problem..
but i think it's my ego..
it's too strong to lose to anyone, could that be it?
Right now, I maybe considered a flirt, when I see an attractive girl, I can't help to but take a glance at her.
But since I'm so self-conscious like what that other 21 year old guy said, I feel my inferiority, so I shy away, even if they glance back..intentionally..I usually test this like the following:
The first glance at me, pretty common, eyes can wander anywhere.
I shift my position such that, there's no other guy in that angle, and that it takes a little more work to notice.
But even when it's quite obvious there's attention, I dare not glance back..not even a peek, is this natural?
Part of this problem is my self-image, lies on my chin, my chin is sloped back slightly, eg. not protruding. in such a way, it can be said to be "ape-like". I know I shouldn't mind so much..but I can't help it, haha. I know many guys that aren't so hot themselves, and yet they can get a girl. So appearances aren't the be all and end all.
Once again, thanks for your time.
Well, that's all the concerns I have for now, thank you once again for your great wisdom and experience, you guys are awesome!
After you graduate from school you should set a priority of making friends.
Start slowly with a potential friend. They don't want to be overwhelmed by your personality. It takes time to build up a friendship. Once you develop the ability to form friendships, you might hope that some of the friendships with women could become more than a friendship.
Don't worry about your chin. People are attracted, in the long run, by the beauty of another's soul rather than the body.
Don't play games when other women look at you. Either look at them and smile, or ignore them. Moving around to different angles is counter-productive.
Again, wait until you graduate before concentrating on this subject. Once you have a job, you will feel more confident and things will go more smoothly for you.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com