we talked it out and stuff and I THOUGHT we were good
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Hello, okay I have been periodically writing in here with my situation and then I had stopped when things between my ex and I got better. We had been hanging out and getting along well, etc. For example, last Friday my parents went away and he came over and spent the night at my house. We went to the movies, sat and talked for hours, and he told me he is still IN love with me (I had asked if he just loved me still or if he still was in love with me and he said both) and we had a talk about how in the future we will both have to move on but we will always be best friends. I asked what if future girlfriends don't like us being friends, and he said "too bad for them because I'm not losing you" and gave me a huge hug. He always gives me hugs out of nowhere saying "Youre the best" and told me I'm his only friend that he can talk to and I know the most about him, not like with his other friends.
Well after that we got into a little argument on Tuesday night. I wasn't even mad or anything, but he had just been talking to some other people about these huge events going on in his life and then hadn't told me anything about them so I was wondering why he wasn't talking to me about that stuff...and he got so mad at me saying he doesn't have to tell me every little detail of his life or something but then we talked it out and stuff and I THOUGHT we were good...the next day we talked online for a few minutes and he asked how I was doing etc....then the next couple days after that he hadn't been online or anything and usually we talk every night online so I sent him an email asking if he blocked me...and gave him a phone call saying I'm worried if hes mad at me and that I thought we were okay (cuz sometimes he doesnt get my emails) but he never called back...so I went on my friends msn that has him on there and he was online and so I tried talking to him saying it's me but he wouldn't answer.
So the next couple days I just wrote him messages, emails and stuff saying I'm really sorry I about what had happened on Tuesday and I hope he can just forget the little fight. On Friday he had also finally added me to his friends list on his online journal so I could read it...then Wednesday he deleted it, which I found odd. Then last night I was browsing other journals...and I found a new one that he had created (it had his name and picture, etc) and this is what it said:
Nov 2nd: "Well this journal is to notify all that this is my new LJ. due to people who try to get everything out of my life and get upset when i dont tell them every single detail even though we broke up and i dont neeeeed to tell them anything, they continue to think they can get upset at me.
so this is the result, the beginning stage of getting her out of my life.
goodbye to you."
Nov. 3: "OK YOU DONT HAVE TO LOG INTO YOUR FRIENDS MSN TO SEE THAT I HAVE BLOCKED YOU...GET THE F*CKIGN HINT YOU CRAZY PERSON!"
I can't even belive after how nice he has been to me lately that he is doing this...I mean we just finished promising eachother we would be best friends forever and that nothing would ruin that. His friendship means so much more to me than the relationship did, I mean I was completely heartbroken after we broke up but I never thought he'd end the friendship too...I mean I could handle being broken up but I just can't handle him not in my life at all he is my absolute best friend and I was completely destroyed when I read that. I mean this is worse than the breakup.
I dont know what I should do, can you please help?
P.S - a few weeks back he had written in his old journal that he had been thinking about someone a lot lately and that he shouldn't but he couldn't help it. He wrote " it could hurt in the end. Oh well at least there's a friend there". He didnt expect me to read it cuz I never read his journal but I did...and when I asked him about if it was this one girl he had been hanging out with that had a boyfriend...he said no theyre just friends, so I asked who it was about and he said "you". Which surprised me because I did not expect that.
So how come one minute hes thinking about me nonstop and saying he's in love with me and the next he blocks me and doesn't want me in his life in any way?
This boy has mental problems probably related to some kind of major stress that he has in his life. Try to figure out what it might be and perhaps that will help you understand his behavior better.
His off and on attitude toward you is a result of that stress. Don't take it too personally, he is probably having the same trouble with other people too.
My advice is to stay away from him for a while and see if he can get his act back together again. No reason for you to be a punching bag!
Best of luck to you. George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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Be happy without him