What I can't figure out is, does he like me or does he just like knowing that I like him?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I am 30 years old and have been in many relationships. However the one from high school is the one I always return to. I was so infatuated with this guy then and we have remained friends. We live on opposite coasts and have since high school. About 6 years ago he came out to visit me. We spent a week together and had an awesome time. We talked about everything, including our future plans, kids, etc. The last night he was in town we had sex. After he went back I ended up getting in a relationship. Last year was our 10 year reunion. I brought my boyfriend even though we were having a lot of trouble. My HS boyfriend showed up and I was the first person he asked to see. However my bf at the time was extrememly jealous and we never got to talk. I am single now and a couple months ago talked to my hs boyfriend on the phone. I had plans to return home for a visit. Before I even mentioned the dates he offered to make the 6 hour drive to come see me while I was in town. He gave up a weekend he had planned with the guys in Vegas to come see me! The questions he aske me are not typpical. He asks when I'm moving back(home), how many kids I want, he tells me he could see himself being married, etc. So when I met up with him he had a hotel room even though the night before he had stayed at his dad's. We spent the whole day together and he remembered everything from what I drink to modane things I had mentioned over the phone. He flirted a lot and brought up a lot of old memories. We ended up back at the hotel in bed making out. hen things went to the next level however he said he didn't think it was a good idea. He said he wanted me to stay the night but my flight left hours from then and I had to go back to my parents for my luggage. He walked me to my car and kissed me goodbye. I talked to him on the phone a few days later and said I didn't mean to make him uncomfortable. He said he wasn't and that he hoped the same. At the end he said he would call me over the weekend and it has been 10 days since then!
I am confused!! Twice he has traveled hours to come see me, he has changed plans to see me. When we are together he asks important questions and we get a long famously. We obviously have physical attraction to one another. I am certain that he knows I am crazy about him. What I can't figure out is, does he like me or does he just like knowing that I like him? I would have assumed he was just in it for the sex but he called that off and he could have easily had sex in Vegas if that was what he wanted. Could it be the geographical distance? What should I ask him? I'm afraid of being shut down by someone I care for so much.
It's very difficult to see where he is coming from.
The best way to find out is to call him and ask him. Perhaps it's some minor thing that is troubling him, or it could be major. In any case, you won't find out unless you ask.
First call just do chit-chat so he doesn't feel pressured. But next call gently and lovingly ask him if anything has changed and how he feels.
By then, he should be eager to explain himself.
Hope this helps!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com