She was the most kind and caring person but now all she cares about is having fun

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I have been married for 10 months. Over the last few months my Wife has turned into a different person. She was the most kind and caring person but now all she cares about is having fun. We don't get to spend much time together because of our jobs(I wish I could find a better one). When I come home late at night from work she is almost always out at a bar or a club. She seems not to care that I sit at home worried about her. Any other time when we might beable to spend time together she seems to avoid it. Often times she doesn't care at all if she does something to hurt me. I try to just deal with the pain but at some point I have to ask her why she treats me like that and that leads to an arguement. Our relationship is all about what she wants. Our marriage seems to be close to ending and the only thing I did wrong was have a crappy job, be needy and be my boring self. I just asked her on the phone(she is out of town for work) if she loves me. She said she did but she doesn't know if she wants to be with me. I just don't know how to make her want to be with me. Sorry that this question is so long but it seems like it should be much longer. Advice
Sounds like it would be helpful for you to find a better job.

Make that your number 1 priority and spend your off-work time looking for a job. It's not easy to do, but being very active will make you feel better (once you find the job). Remember a lot of jobs are word-of-mouth, or just have a sign in the window. Even a change in the hours would be helpful because you would be home the same hours as your wife.

Your wife will see you working hard at finding a new job and will have more respect for you. That will help too. You won't seem so needy because you won't feel that way. You will feel more in charge of yourself.

The boring feeling is a form of mild depression which will also go away once you get a new job.

Look at this as a challenge which you will overcome. There are jobs out there with your name on them... you just have to hunt them down.

Good luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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