Wow I didn't think things can get so complicated, but they sure do

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Wow I didn't think things can get so complicated, but they sure do. I met this guy a few months back and at first I was not attracted to him, everyone said I was too picky and should learn to put myself out there. I have only had three relationships and all three left me stranded with someone other than me in their bed. So putting myself completely out there for a man is not common, well anyway with Doe (that's what we'll call him)I found myself liking his personality and the appearance just kind of fell into place as well, I can be myself around him and I am actually being more open and less reserved towards him. We met back in Jan, had our first date in Feb and gone out every weekend since. We spent the night together at this hotel and me being a virgin I was a little nervous but excited at the same time. I planned everythihing out and he had went to the store for what i thought he would be buying protection. Things got pretty heated between us and when I asked for protection he laughed and things ended there. Since then the topic of sex has not been mention until recently. He knows I'm not like most girls and I've told him that I can't sleep with just anyone and that I would have to be the only one in the picture, he doesn't say much about the topic. We agreed nothing serious back in Feb and now feelings formed and he claims wanting nothing serious but knowing I won't give up my virginity to someone just to leave me in the morning isn't an option. He invited me over to his new place and I kind of know something may happen, I've been meaning for something to happen between us intimately but he said nothing would happen until we were both on our own. Am I dumb for wanting him to be my first, I don't think I love him but strong feelings are there. After a few months of constantly going on feelings are expected right? I'm suppose to go to his house and i want to be intimate but how do I know it is something worth doing? Advice
This is very complicated!

He doesn't seem ready for sex and you aren't sure. Yet, you are a virgin in your 20's and not for moral reasons.

I can't advise any particular action. You need to think of what you really want and try to make it happen. The guy doesn't sound too helpful in your thought process. You don't think you are in love with.

Perhaps you think it is time to lose your virginity and want to get it over with... this is certainly up to you and your choice, whatever it is, is valid.

Good luck,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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