Get out of that arguing habit

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months. I moved in with him about a month and a half ago. We fight about once every 4-5 days or so...over stupid stuff.

Today we started arguing about finances. He doesn't want to combine incomes right now, he said it's too soon. I told him then maybe it was too soon to move in together too. We continued to argue about finances and it stemmed into him only cleaning up the messes that he makes and doing his own laundry from now on. I only did his laundry because he would only do it once every few weeks or so and it would start to stink up the bedroom.

We fight all the time, and rarely about money, mostly about stupid things. I love him and he loves me and I want this to work out. We try to sit down and have an adult civil conversation but it always ends up in an argument with things said that we regret.

What do I do?? I'm so lost. Advice
Arguing is a habit that should be broken as soon as possible.

Figure out something you both feel comfortable doing to break up an argument. It could be something as simple as saying "I don't feel arguing now, let talk about it later. Or just switch positions physically. Or switch positions in the argument... you argue from his point of view and he argues from yours.

If you can't figure out something then there is little hope of a long term healthy relationship for you two.

Good luck to you!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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