A true muddle of feelings
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Okay, I have loved my best friend for 7 months last year. But he had a girlfriend. Before his girlfriend, I had a feeling that he liked me, I was right because I asked him. But he said that he "used" to like me. The problem was that I didn't know how I felt about him, so I lied saying that I used to like him too. Then I started liking him for real this time, but then he got a girlfriend, which I knew her. School began again, after a long summer. I rarely ever saw him. I couldn't stand him. The less I saw him, the more I wanted him. Finally I told him how I felt, online though. He told me that he liked me too, but was confused because he liked his girlfreind too. Then, time passed and I got mad at him just because I hadn't seen him for awhile. We finally got to talk. Then the subject came again. He said he loved, but didn't know what to do. It was really hard for me hearing that from him, not knowing if it was true. Finally, last month his girlfriend brokeup with him. Three days later, he asks me out. We kissed our first kiss ever. It was okay. So, we started going out, which we have been for three weeks. I was so happy that we were going out and everything was going great, but I was worried that he rushed into things, knowing that his girlfriend just brokeup with him. Do you think he rushed into things because he was heart broken from his break up? Do you think he still might have feelings for her. He really is sweet, and he always compliments me and tells me he loves me. I have another problem though. I don't have these strong feelings about him and I don't even see a future with him, like I did when we weren't going out. I used to be so crazy about him. Now it seems that I'm always getting annoyed by the things he does. I also don't find him as cute anymore. Do I not like him anymore. Should we not be together anymore?
He may be on the rebound as you suggest. Perhaps he needs more time after his break up to be completely over her. You are not attracted to him anymore. It would be a kindness to explain how you feel and let him look for someone new. It will be painful for him since he will now be dumped by two girls in a very short amound of time. But there isn't much choice.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com