She has a boyfriend

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Hello again! Well, I have bad news. I struck out again. I was talking to the girl I liked and she then blurted out that she has a boyfriend! I KNEW IT!!!!! Of course, I knew I had to be okay with this. Well, I'm about to just give up on this when I really don't want to. My shyness and my being EXTREMELY anti-social (I see being anti-social as a VERY bad thing, 100x worse than shyness, IMO) is keeping me from getting what I want for almost 3 years! (I am now 17)
This HAS to be fixed and it has to be fixed NOW!

I would like you to tell me, or better yet, EXPLAIN to me IN DETAIL just what am I doing wrong?

You have to help me! I will never find anyone, EVER! I really don't want to be alone for the rest of my life!

Thanks again!
Sorry if I seem angry. (I am!) Advice
I'm sorry she has a boyfriend. One thing you can do is to continue to talk to her and create a friendship. It sounds like you are already doing that. Keep at it and someday she may break up with him.

As far as your anti-social and shy nature, you need to get some professional help for this. If your school has a psychologist, this is a good place to start. If your parents have health insurance ask them if they could find a psychologist to help you out.

Meanwhile you can reduce your shortcomings by simply being honest with people. This is a scary thing to do and takes bravery. Look around you and see how many kids are by themselves like you. Reach out to them and practise your social skills with them. They will be very grateful for your attention. Keep doing it and you will no longer be shy or anti-social. Are you strong enough to do that one thing?

Good luck to you,

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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