Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Well there is this amazing girl i am very fond of. I have been friends with her for about 1 year. I have a guy friend who is one of my best friends, and who also is a friend of hers.
Problem is that she spends an unbelievable amount of time with him. So eventually she tells him that she likes him more than a friend. He comes to me, knowwing i like her, and asks me about it. Of course i wasnt happy and i let him know about it. But the thing is that he doesnt like her in that way. So one day she came over and she and I talked, and she spoke of how she would not want to hurt my friendship with my guy friend and she didnt want to hurt me. So i just went and told her how i feel about her. She knew i had feelings for her before, but I dont think she knew i stil have them now. So now she is still talking to my guy friend, and he isnt responding the way she wants to. I feel she is hurting somewaht, and probably is blaming me for him not responding to her. Of course, i want her to be happy, even with my best friend, but the actuallity is that he doesnt like her.
How in the world can i win this girl over?I think i may be in love with her. I care for her so much, and ive told her i have feelings for her.....my friend doesnt like her, so she will have to move on eventually. I dont know how to win this girl. Please tell me what you think of this entire situation and give me advice.
This is a triangular situation, although not the traditional one where two people love one person. But being triangular, it makes it more difficult to deal with than more standard one-on-one problems.
In this situation, ideally all three persons could come out happy. Be very sure that your male friend really has nothing but friendship feelings for the woman. After all, they spend a lot of time together. Have a sincere conversation with him and make sure how he feels about her. If he really has only friendship feelings, ask him to include you as a trio when he and she go out. Gradually she may discover what a good guy you are and switch her feelings to you. Here's hoping that happens!!
Best of luck,
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com