She Avoids Me, She Doesn't Want to Kiss
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
I have a couple of questions. The first is me and my girlfriend have been dating for 7 months now and she hardly puts any effort into seeing me, (she has been this way the whole time we have been dating) she says she cares and i believe her. But i have only seen her once this summer and ahe has time because she is almost always with her firneds. Everytime i ask her to do something it takes her a while to ask her mom and by the time she gets a answer its a cuple days later and i cann't. I am really getting mad and every time i try and talk to her she thinks we will fight and doesn't want to talk about it. She says she wants to see me but i can't help but beleive she would rather hang out with her firned 4 days in a row then see me once.
We talk a lot on line and by text messaging but i really want to see her more then once a month. Do you think there is a reason why she doesn't put much effort into see me? And is there anything i can do to get her to want to see me more?
And the Second question is She never wants me to kiss her or anything i know she isn't afraid to because the party i met her at she was all over this guy. But she has not once wanted to do anything with me in the last seven months she says she does but we have had chance to and there is always this exscuse and i don't want her to feel uncomfortable around me so i don't pressure her or anything like that. Is there a reason for this? I am really confused. Thanks
It sounds like this girl just isn't ready to date yet. She is sort of keeping you around to say she has a boyfriend, but she doesn't put any time or energy into it. You're completely correct here - she has plenty of time for friends, but not for you. A boyfriend should be a BEST friend - the friend she wants to spend time with more than any others. If she is seeing all of her other friends but doesn't make the time for you, that's just wrong.
Not only that, but communication is THE key in any relationship. Your girlfriend hides from talking to you because it's scary?? You're upset about something - and her solution is to refuse to talk about it even though you WANT to talk about it. Most girls whine that their guys refuse to talk. Here you are wanting to talk and she refuses to listen. That's just wrong.
Finally, kissing is a very personal expression of fondness. You are quite good and right to not want to pressure her. But she should *willingly* want to kiss you. Like you said, it's not that she is anti-kissing or too young for kissing. She's kissed in the past. She is refusing to kiss you because she doesn't feel that close.
It's time to sit down and have a serious talk with her, and find out just what she thinks she is in your life. She certainly isn't acting like a girlfriend.
-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com