My girlfriend has a lot of male friends and male co-workers.
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
My girlfriend has a lot of male friends and male co-workers. For example, there is this guy that she works with who drives her to work at her request. She hads confessed to the guy that she is attracted to him. The guy is very attracted to her as well, to the point that he has made various advances on her.
We also have this mutual friend that she has been talking to a lot about our relationship.
Should I feel threatened by either of these guys or by the fact that she befriends many males? Should I be threatened by the fact that she confides in other people about our relationship and not me? I ask that because I hate when other people meddle in a relationship. Thank you for your help.
I think on the whole it's always good for people to be able to have friends of both sexes. It's a healthy relationship that can handle it. In this situation, the piece that feels fishy is that guy she has said she's attracted to. You mean to tell me she told -him- that she feels this way? That's not a good sign. I wouldn't go blaring all the alarms yet, but I would suggest that you talk with her about the strength of the relationship and her intentions toward this guy. I know that I can tell my boyfriend that I'm attracted to someone and he knows there's no reason to worry... I love him and only him, a passing hottie's not going to make me stray. But you need to have this same confidence in her, and it sounds like you're a little worried. It's definitely time to sit down and talk with her about it.
For her talking with others about your relationship, that's pretty normal, I wouldn't worry about that. But encourage the open honesty that's necessary in your relationship. She should be able to come to you with everything she's telling her friends.
I wish you the best.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com