my ex and I still have feelings for each other

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
okay!! my ex and I have been broken up for about a year now.But my ex and I still have feelings for each other and we flirt every time we see each other but I don't think me and my ez should get back together because I broke up with him for a good reason and he apologized so we tried it again and he kept his promise but I broke it up after 3 months because I was scard of him hurting me again after he repeatedly told me he wouldn't and now even to this day he doesn'talk to any girls in that type of manner, although he has been around and seen that I have been in many realationships since our breakup and he hasn't said anything about it but he does try to avoid any subject dealing with who I am with even if that means ending friendships with my boyfriends.He has asked me numerous times if we could try again but I am afraid of him hurting me again even though he promises he won't and even though he has shown me that he will keep his promise .My question is what do I do?? and also how do I reassure myself?????this boy was my 1st love,I had my 1st kiss with him and at one point I thought I would loose my virginity to him but we ended our relationship too early,but I was also his 1st love,he also had his 1st kiss with me and he also thought the same thing I did but it didn't end up that way and now as time goes by I regret everything I did-retaining to our realationship...but I still have A LOT of feelings for him and he has EVEN MORE feelins for me.But another thing that worries me is,since I was his first love is the only reason why he feels this way is because he hadn't been in any other realationships or is it since I got hurt once,I'm scard of thinking it would happen again????
If yopu could answer my question I would deeply,deeply appreciate it.This boy is very nice and may I add VERY VEFRY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY Cute, and I think that is another thing I'm scard of.....since he looks the way he does will he attract more girls although he's with me(that's the reason I ended it) but he has assured me that won't happen again but my mom has told me to make sens of these words for myself:Once a cheater alwayz a cheater.I want to believe the way he has acted to this whole situation will comtinue but if it doesn't I think I will end up HURTING him and the GIRL in which he cheats on me with....I will have to hurt him the most!! Advice
Your mom is right. If someone has crossed the line once, they have no reason not to in some future situation. They will always find an excuse for why they behaved badly. So expect him to go kissing another girl at some future point, with whatever reason he can come up with at the time.

You're supposed to be able to trust your partner, and this guy isn't all that trustworthy. I know that dumping him will be painful and it's not what you want to do, but it might be the best course of action. Either that, or find yourself forgiving him an awful lot for the stuff that he's capable of doing.

Good luck!

-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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