im very frustated for my boy friend's attitude.

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
im very frustated for several reasons for my boy friend's attitude.we are having this relation for 3 years.we hav sex relation too.many times i feel guilty for having sex.he knows very well.i talked to him many times,everytime i said he also said no more but when we close to each other he want me like that & i become influenced by him & cant control.then after that i feel guilty in2 me. coz we didnt marry yet.2nd problem is manytimes i feel alon-- when im so sad for something i want to share with him but manytimes he dont undrstand my sadness.i wana talk to him but he shows me less interest. it seems like he dont care me & he dont undrstnd me.3)manytimes i miss him so much but he even dont undrstnd my feelings.when he miss me that time he want me to him otherwise my feeling is valueless to him i feel.4)manytimes he dont share his problems what i really want frm him.he just keep himself far away from me when he is sad.

i wana make him more crazy about me,wan him to lov me,care me,think about me,giv me attention always like what i feel for him.on the otherhand he is planning to marry me very soon wan me to be his wife.he says he loves me so much.but these problems make me so sad,frustated,helpless when i see his lack attention,undrstnding,careless.i love him so much. i want his care,understanding,attention,respect me out please Advice
If he wants to marry you, then he's telling you that he loves you and no one else, that he cares about you enough to dedicate the rest of his life to you. While it helps if guys are more cluefull about what women want, the story is that guys typically don't share their feelings, don't share their problems, and don't share their thoughts on how much they care about you.

The problems you are experiencing will mostly go away when you are married, particularly the one about guilt over sex before marriage. But if the problems continue, then you should seriously look at counselling to get it all into the open and find some solutions that work for you both. You might take advantage of it now so that your wedding day will be one where you are convinced that your boyfriend is totally loving you the way you want him to.

Good luck!

-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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