My ex boyfriend cheated on me and its messing me up
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
My ex boyfriend cheated on me and its messing me up and soooo hard to deal with and whats worse is he keeps calling me sparing me the details then he said it was a mistake and he wants me back its hard because i love him but i dont think that i could ever trust him again! He stayed the whole weekend with her instead of me and even brought her home to his mom! hes hurting me and keeps calling me to get bback with him . Im starting a new job soon but its so hard i act different i dont eat or sleep and im going to start a career but all i can do is think of him we were together for one year and a month how long untill i get over him? All i want is to get over him !! but i cant how do i? Please help!!!! :.....( I cry so much and keep thinking of them together it hurts so bad and i feel that i could never fing anyone else like him!!!
RomanceClass.com Advice
Getting over the pain someone else caused you is always highly difficult and obviously painful. Learning to let go of the past will free you to have a more fulfilling future.
You might be finding yourself jealous of those other girls. As you know, jealousy is an INCREDIBLY dangerous emotion that completely destroys relationships. I have a set of information on it here -
http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/howto/jealousy/index.asp
If you want a relationship with him, then I would strongly recommend going to therapy. That way you can say to your ex, "Look I am taking SERIOUS steps to handle this, can you help me?" I think he will be thrilled that you are finally doing something about it and will be more than willing to help, which will bring you two back together again.
If you want to move on, then you need to make it clear to this guy that you don't want contact with him until you are strong enough to handle it. If he cares for you, he won't want to cause you more pain. So hopefully he'll get the message to back off.
Good luck, it will get easier as time passes.
-- from Marc
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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