She Can't Handle Responsibility

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
I just recently got a second job so I have less time to be with my girlfriend. We never really have been sexually active to begin with do to some of her personal issues but just here recently she's not wanted any intimacy of any kind with me. Just the other day she told me she wanted space and then yesterday told me she's tired of being lonely and me working all the time. I am working to support the both of us while she goes out with her friends. Just here lately she hasn't been telling me when she goes out and has been lying to me and doing things behind my back. She says she hates the way we are (the whole me wanting to know where she is idea really bothers her).

In my opinion it is a responsiblitly in the relationship to let the other know that you're going to do something, especially when you've been asked to call and so forth. Do you think she's cheating on me or not in love any more? What should I do? When ever I try to talk to her she acts like I'm pressuring her or something and I love her with all my heart, in fact we've agrred to marry but how can I marry her if she lies and I cannot trust her... She suffers from bipolarism and social anxiety. Please give me some advice I want to save our relationship... Advice
Wow, I know you aren't going to like this answer but I really really recommend you guys go in to talk to a therapist or minister or SOMEONE about this. She is using you incredibly and I doubt that you just telling her will convince her of that. Of course couples that love each other let each other know where they are going to be! And if you are working 2 jobs, she should be doing her part to support you guys - not running around and spending all the loot. She is treating you like her daddy - there to give her cash, but someone that holds her back from being Young Wild and Free.

If you love her, you also have to realize that you should not let her use you. A parent that has a toddler doesn't let the toddler throw tantrums every day. That isn't love, that isn't respect. So it's time to take action to save this relationship - and if she doesn't respect you enough to treat you well, you need to bring in an outside person to talk with her.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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