Living Up to her Standards

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
i am a virgin, and inexpeirnced in everything, my gf isnt, shes done almost everything i dont how she'll react if i dont live up to her standards.. help plz.. Advice
Great lovers aren't just spontaneously created out of nothing. They are people who go slowly and take the time to REALLY get to know their partner. No two people are alike. Some like soft touches, some like hard touches. Some like gentle caresses, some like firm kneading. Some love to kiss. Some hate to kiss. Some love to be petted on the head. Some hate it. So there is NO way you could just somehow "know" all these things about her and do it right.

If anything, your lack of knowledge will be great!! Other guys she dated probably tried to use their "old tricks" on her without even bothering to figure out if it was right for her or not. I hear many teenage girls complain about that with teenage guys. They think there's one way to love a girl and just keep trying it.

So instead, you are starting with a nice, clean slate. All intimacy starts slowly. So start with caressing. Ask her! Make it into a game. Caress her back and ask if she wants it harder. Try it faster and ask if it's better. Not in a "I'm scared, is this right??" way but in a "Let's find the perfect pleasure point for YOUR body" kind of a way. She should really appreciate that!

As you go on, moving on to kissing and more, ask along the way. It'll become your way of communicating with each other. She'll wonder why her other guys never bothered to do this, and by the time you are into anything even remotely sexual, YOU will be an expert on HER body, her wants and desires. Which will make you the greatest lover in the world, as far as she is concerned.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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