He Chose Female Friends over Me
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. The relationship was going good until about a 10 months into it. He met some new "friends" that happen to be girls. Every since then I had to deal with them driving he car, calling his room leaving seducive messages, disrespecting me, and him going to visit them all of the time staying there really late. I have talked to him about it and told him how I feel. But yet he still does it.
Then just yesterday I caught him in a lie when he was really up there seeing them, but lied to me and said he was working late. What should I do?
RomanceClass.com Advice
On one hand I definitely believe that men should have female friends and that jealousy should be worked on. But I really think you've gone above and beyond the call of duty here. A relationship should always be about YOU TWO and be based on trust. He is letting these girls disrespect you, interfere in your relationship and now he's lying to you about it. He has chosen his 'fun' with them over the honor of the relationship with you.
I really don't think you can argue sense into him. He is focussing on fun and not on his commitment to you. The more you try to rein him in, the more he'll think of you as a controlling "mom" that is trying to squash all of his fun. He should be with you because he wants to be, not because you are telling him to.
So tell him that you need a boyfriend that will be there for you and who will stand by your side. If he wants to spend his time gallavanting with others, you deserve to find a guy who wants to spend his time loving you.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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