I Got a Girl Pregnant, We Broke Up, Now What?

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
I dated this girl for about a year. Things started going not so well and i ended up kissing a girl. It ate at me everyday getting worse as time went on. I knew if i told her it would be the end. I started getting angry at myself and with her. We stopped communicating and it eventually lead to us breaking up. She moved in with one of my friends exwives.The girl that i kissed was even living there. Then i told her what my problem has been. I kissed a girl and it was really bothering me. Well i really hurt her when i told her that. She wouldnt have anything to do with me. A week later she was with another guy. I think it was just to get back at me. It worked and i went after him and kicked his ass. It didnt help my problems any. It didnt work out with them. Then she started seeing another guy.

I stayed away and got with a girl to fill the hole in my heart. Well then she finds out that she is pregnant. We broke up in the end of july and she is due on april 22. She swears up and down that the kid isnt mine. It could very well be mine. She ended up moving back into her foster families house with her two sisters. She has been living there for about 4 months.

We talk to each other all the time on the net. I love her more than anything and i want to be with her if the kid is mine or not. I tri getting her to come back to me all the time. One min she loves me and wants to be with me and the next she dont. She is saying that she loves me and wants to have a family with me. Her sisters are telling her that they will disown her if she comes back to me. Thats the last thing she wants to do is loose her family.

All i know is i love this girl more than any girl i ever been with.Im really confused on what she wants. I just wonder if im wasting my time. I know she loves me.When we met it was love at first sight.We grew so close in such a little time. When we was together i was so scared of commetment and marrage.Now i would do anything if she would accept my hand in marrage. You think i should keep fighting to be with her or just give up and move on??? She keeps saying that she would love to be with me but she dont want to loose her family.Its been almost 6 months and i still cant get over her.

RomanceClass.com Advice
Well first off, for the child's sake it's important to learn who the father is. There are all sorts of health issues that trace through genetics so knowing who the father is is critical for the baby - to know for his or her entire life. There are super tests out there that very easily determine who the father is.

Once you know that, you at least resolve one outstanding issue. Then work to slowly regain the trust of the family. You'll have to win over the entire family. This will take a while, but it certainly can be done.

-- from Lisa
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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