A Promise Proposal
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
hi! how u doin? i wanted to do a little promise proposal to my girlfriend but i dont know what to say. not will you marry one but one leading to that. can u help me out in what to say? thanx
It sounds like you're inventing something that's not very usual :) People ask people to get married, because it is a legal, serious, until-death commitment that is understood in courts. People ask each other to move in to a house or apartment, which is an equally serious commitment because it involves opening your entire world to the other person, not just "fun times" and "weekends".
The first level of commitment is the "dating exclusively" one, where you are deliberately excluding all chance of hooking up with another person and focus 100% on each other to see if this relationship will work or not work.
So the question is, what exactly is the "milestone" you're celebrating with this promise proposal? You promise to propose? That seems sort of silly since a proposal is also a question. So you promise to ask a question? Does she promise to say yes to a proposal? That also seems a bit without meaning. You want your commitments to each other to have meaning, otherwise it lessens the value of the commitment you're making.
Instead of inventing pre-questions to questions, concentrate simply on showing her you love her, having her show you she loves you, and spending time enriching your relationship. There are enough people out there who DID marry and then divorced to show that just a ring or a commitment isn't what makes a relationship work. It involves people actually "walking the walk" instead of concentrating on "talking the talk". So don't invent new promises - instead, BE a great boyfriend in your normal, daily life. If that doesn't seem special to you, then that's not a very good sign!!
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com