My Friend Likes a Girl

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
This guy and I have been friends for 13 years now, and neither of us has ever even kissed another person. We both had crushes on one person (each) for about four years, and the guy I liked ditched me a few months ago. Now, this girl that he liked has been really back-and-forth with him, all the time. He doesn't really seem to like her anymore, but just doesn't want to hurt her. When the three of us are hanging out now, they hardly ever talk, and we talk about everything, have a lot of physical contact (a lot compared to what's normal for us, at least), etc.

And...I think I have feelings for him. I have quite a few times off and on over the years, but he wanted someone else so I left it alone. Now, I don't know if I should try to stop these "romantic" feelings ASAP or wait to see if he finally ends things with this other girl. I'm not still in the rebound or anything, and I have no intentions of just springing all this on my friend, but I don't want to risk getting my hopes up with something that isn't going to happen. Thank you! Advice
You say that he's with this other girl, but that he hasn't even kissed her. That doesn't really sound like he's dating her. It sounds like he sort of wants to date her and hasn't gotten around to doing it. If he's not dating her, he's fair game.

So start it slowly, I have advice on going from friend to boyfriend-girlfriend -

and see how things develop! If he DOES ask her out, then back off and be just a friend. But since he is NOT dating her, you are free to pursue him.

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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