Going to a Concert
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I'm very big into going to music shows (concerts) and 9 times out of 10 I go alone. I went to one and while standing in line I met this girl who was with 2 of her guy friends so immediatly I think "one of them is her boyfriend." Because I didn't want to piss anyone off I didn't conversate with her at all.
About 2 weeks after the show I see her walking towards the building I have class in so I asked her if she was at that show, she reconized me but one of the guys in my class knew her already so the score sheet is now, 2 attempted conversations, 0 completed conversations.
Anyways moving on I'd like to get to know her alot better but the only time I ever see her is when we're in the same building and the guy that's in my class and knows her always makes comments that I like her, this doesn't make this situation any easier.
Now whenever I see her or she see's me we just smile and say "hi" and she walks away. But anyways moving on I want to get to know her better but I feel like there's a wall (the guy) I can't get around.
I have something to talk about with her, the music we both listen to, I just need some advice on how to keep her attention on our conversation and since I only see her when this guy is around, how to deal with the faces, comments and immaturity of his persona.
As a side note, the band that was playing the night I met her is coming back to town within the next few weeks. Would it not be smart if I asked her if she wanted to go, assuming we finally complete a conversation, purely on a friendship basis?
This other guy sounds like a real jerk!! Jeez, instead of being even neutral he is being actively intrusive. I suppose giving him a cold or something so he stays home sick is out of the question.
Definitely this other concert sounds like a great idea. There must be SOME way to have this conversation with her without El Jerko being around. Maybe write a note saying you always have to go to these concerts alone because you don't know anybody who shares your taste in music - and would she go with you as a friend - and GIVE it to her. That way it's clear it's a friendly, non-romantic thing, so it's not threatening. She can read it and call or email you later with the response (give her your phone # and email address) and that way you now have a way to talk to her without other people listening in.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com