We're Both Nervous - Does She Like Me?
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
theres a girl that i cant get her name and image out of my head. i think that she likes me but im not sure. some of my friends tried to help me by telling her that i like her. she said that she would go out with me but she dosent know me. one of my friends asked her if she liked me and he told me she just smiled about the mention of my name and kept walking. shes smiling and staring at me in class. sometimes she licks her lips. every time that i get close to her i get nervous and try to avoid complete contact. one time i was about to ask her and she said " I have to go " in a sweet voice while she smiled. i have tried to wait after class but i keep geting nervous. like last week i was waiting outside my class and when she came out she sorta hid her face but kept her eyes on me and smiled. i think that she likes me but one of her friends that hates me tells me that she dosent like me. she seems to avoid me nervously like i also do. what should i say or do to let her know? and does she really like me? is it a good thing or bad thing that she avoids me but is always looking at me?
It sounds like you skipped over the first step which was to become friends with her and talk with her to learn more about her :) Don't just go diving into asking her out. If you can't even talk with her for 5 minutes yet, then going on an entire date is going to be sheer torture :) Build up the friendship first. Don't go towards her with the intention of "I'm going to do this REALLY stressful thing and then she's going to have the stress of having to answer in the middle of a public place". Instead, just TALK to her. Say hi every time you see her. Nothing huge and monumental, just hi. Ask her how class was. Ask her how the homework assignment was. Ask her if she saw XXX on TV last night. Hopefully you know her hobbies if you're already trying to date her, so ask her about those.
Build up the ability to talk with her first. It takes practice. The more you do it, the easier and more natural it becomes. When you guys are talking each time you meet and able to talk for 10 minutes without running away in nervous terror, then it's time to suggest you go see a movie together that you both enjoy - but ask her in PRIVATE!
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com