Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I wont bother with the past story, its infuriating and i keep gettings screwed over and blocked by things i cant control, i keep thinking of new ways to give myself a chance to make it happen and now its all worse. Onto the present, basically my friend ended up in a bad situation, VERY BAD, and i kept going in there to get her out. She finally got away and under police protection. I have no problems with them not disclosing information. I was contacted by one officer who told me she was safe and okay, he offered to give her my phone # cuz she had to leave her cell behind. Then he gave me the extension of the officer who is working on her case, told me to talk to that guy if i needed information or to pass on any more information to my friend saying it shouldnt be a problem. Well officer 2 shot me down, and after a 15 min conversation he finally agreed to pass on my email address. or so he said. Nothing for a month. Contacted officer 1 again because i have been left with so little options everything i need to say is on a letter OMGAWD i hate that this cant be in person.

THIS IS REDICULOUS. She was in that hell hole for 9 months and it was painful and a struggle to get to her there. When i got that call saying she was safe and okay i felt 200 pounds lighter, and stupid me for getting my hopes up thinking "hey, im gonna get to see her, talk to her, take my shot, and see her OUTSIDE of that hell hole" I was doing a happy dance. And seeing as she vanished for a month i had feared the worst...then like a bolt i get called to be told shes okay and safe.

So i call officer 1 about my holiday letter and he says it wont be a problem but i still have to speak with officer 2. It shouldnt be a problem just get him to meet you in person and he will check and deliver the letter.
I call officer 2. He shoots me down AGAIN!!!

Okay so now i am racing against the clock cuz her history is her jumping at guys to start relationships cuz she doesnt like to be alone, i may have lost her already. IM BEING BLOCKED by an officer when the others are saying it should be no problem.

I cant write her, mail cant be delivered, dont know her new phone # or addy for security reasons, she dont have fb, and the email she had up till this point i sent the letter through as an email however if her email account was deactivated but not cancelled for security reasons or that she didnt use it for months I wont even know if she got it. Cuz it could be she did but no response or just inactive, and inactive emails dont send by "notification delivery status failed" messages, they just take the email cuz the addy hasnt been terminated.

So WHAT do i do now? I need to see her, this has been tough and this is making it tougher. Im out of ideas for how to reach her, only thought i had was contacting a law firm to see if they could find a loophole or way that i can go back to cop2 and say "blablabla send the damn letter!" or "blablabla you HAVE to now, now that i know this." cuz truth be told if one cop of the same status is saying this shouldnt be a problem then the other cop is just CHOOSING not to do it, because he can.

I could lose my best friend, and the love of my life, and im just trying to TAKE MY SHOT, and i keep getting blocked BY THIS STUPID xxxx! I might already be too late, i dont know but this is a horrible experience and im out of ideas!

I keep hearing love finds a way well love and my brain are hitting walls. I just want to be able to communicate with her so i can be with my friend and have a chance to try to be so much more...and im getting denied that by things that had LITTLE ODDS OF HAPPENING! And this is just the present...ive been hacked by other ridiculous stuff before.

ANY ideas as to how i can get around this? Advice
There are no easy answers to this kind of situation, so you are going to have to get creative. First off, who DOES have access to your friend? Her parents? Her siblings? Her case manager? A therapist or doctor? Go to them and beg them to give her a letter from you. Say you have been trying to let her know you support her and care about her, and that you have no other way to reach her.

If no one has access to this girl, then yes, find a lawyer who can help you. Make a ton of phone calls and ask for referrals to other lawyers - surely someone must know what your options are in this situation. See what channels you can follow and pursue any leads. Even people who are incarcerated still have rights, and surely there is a way to get someone to legally help you.

Another idea - is there a third officer to talk to? Or a fourth or fifth? A police chief or captain? Maintain your cool, be very calm, but be a regular pest around the police station. Bring them some cookies or Taco Bell burritos or something yummy to pass out around the station (not as a bribe! Leave them with the receptionist). Eventually, someone will probably take pity on you and try to help.

Basically, you are going to have to become a very nice pest to everyone you can think of to get through. Always maintain your cool. If your friend is worth the effort to you, then keep trying and you WILL succeed. Good luck.

-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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