How do I prevail over two other guys?
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
First off, I am the kind of person who has two mood sets: I am either very shy and interpersonal (and generally uninteresting), or confident, funny, and intrapersonal. It all depends on my mood.
Now for my situation. There is a girl that I have liked for about a year, and have tried to build a friendship with her since I met her. But I took too much time doing this, and another guy (whom is very funny and has more flirtacious qualities than me) has nudged his way in in a very short time, and clearly is looking for the same thing I am. Let's call him guy "A". On top of that, she asked a different guy out, from my observations, it was out of desperation. He is a geeky sortta guy who is very intent on his school work, but is not shy. He will be refered to as "B". This girl is one of those that love to laugh, and so, naturaly, A and I are better off than B, as long as I am in the right mood.
For a while I have thought that I was in third in this crazy race until The other night when she and I went out to a movie with A and another one of our friends, and I think I showed her how much fun I could be. But on the way home, she nuzzled up next to A in the back seat and went to sleep on his shoulder (that may just be her friendly personality, or something else). What can I do to win her over in the long run? I am not looking to "steal" her from anyone, just put myself in a position to be able to compete with the other two guys, and in the long run have a try at dating her. In a week or so, we (this girl, A, and the other friend) are going on a long trip, which I think I can use to my advantage as long as I can separate her from A. What can I do on this trip to win her over, and make it so she is sleeping on my shoulder, and not A's?
You say you have two personalities - which one are you when you're with her? If she's seen both sides of you she may think that you're inconsistent and moody, not the kind of guy a normal stable girl would like. If you want a relationship with her you need to be upfront and tell her how you feel. Show her your best side, but above all be consistent and honest.
-- from Jill
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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