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We cannot do great things on this Earth, only small things with great love. --Mother Teresa

Thought i was over her...

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I started going out with my girlfriend back in October of my senior year. I had just started hanging out with a new group of friends she was apart of and we grew close and ended up together. I had flings with other girls through high school but i had never had a steady girlfriend. We had a blast together that winter, i was extremely happy, until about February when the light started to fade. I no longer felt as strong a connection with her, and although i tried to hide it, she noticed. By march i was over my weird stage and I reminded myself why i loved spending time with her. But when she returned from a DECA (a school club) conference she was acting extremely different. Two days later she broke up with me and i was devastated. We had a really tight knit group of friends and it nearly shattered our group, as the two of us were a staple for our groups friendship. The school year went on, and i distracted myself in lacrosse the season. When prom came i had no date, and she had been asked by another guy that she was friends with. Seeing the pictures of her with another guy at prom made me feel robbed. I got extremely jealous, and suddenly realized i still had strong feelings for her despite the fact i had convinced myself otherwise.
A couple weeks before graduation our "group" started hanging out again, including my ex. Things were just like they were before we had gone out, except for me because i knew i had to hide my feelings for her. When Graduation came we ended up at the same party. I got drunk and txted her and asked her to talk. We met outside and i stammered out drunkenly that i still had feelings for her, she softly responded with "well.. I've sorta moved on..." We agreed to talk about it when we were sober and we went back to the party. Late that night, we were the last couple people to go to sleep. Some guy was trying to get with her, disgusted i moved myself across the room and fell asleep. To my surprise in the middle of the night she woke me up and before i knew it we were hooking up. The next morning was quiet and we didn't talk much, she txted me an apology for the night before and we agreed it probably shouldnt have happened. We hung out with some friends a couple of days later and everything seemed normal, but there were hints of awkwardness between us.

My question is, my emotions surfaced because of being intoxicated, that's why i asked her to talk when sober i never would have... Thinking about that night with her it kills me not knowing where her actions came from... but I'm afraid to pursue it because i don't want to ruin any chances i may have if i wait. We are going to the same college next year, so there isn't any reason we couldn't have a long relationship... I'm just not sure to wait or not...or how to sit down and talk with her about us.

RomanceClass.com Advice
You were drunk and perhaps she was too and things happened. You both seem to have dealt with it on a positive note.

I suggest that you talk it over with her and mention college. It is possible that she is hoping you will do this. She also knows there is a potential future for you.

Even if your talk doesn't work out, there is always the future where things will be ok.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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