cycle of doom pt2...

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hi...this will be the last time i think...that i will ever post on this site.

Look up the one titled: cycle of doom in general dating for the back story.

You know what happened since then?

I tried my best to get her to feel better, tried to show her that there are people out there.

And guess what she did? She jumped to a conclusion about something, thought i thought she meant nothing to me,


She told me, she knows he doesnt love her, wont ever, and neither will she him, shes given up, he "broke her now he buys her".

I FAILED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I tried my heart out for years and i failed!!!! I did everything i could!!! And it didnt matter!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She gave up!

And im so depressed i cant even look at myself in the mirror.

HE RUINED THIS GIRL! Left! Came back years later! And picked up the pieces! He's a monster.

HE CRUSHED MY FRIEND! He crushed somebody that i used to love and gave every beat of my heart and piece of my soul to try and save and at least feel better about her self and point her to a good life.

AND I CANT EVEN SEE STRAIGHT AND DONT WANT to live in a world where this can possibly happen!

Im grieving like shes dead. im literally going through the stages.

I LOST HER! Some really special guy out there in the future lost her! SHE LOST EVERYTHING!


She's only doing this for the family! And i feel responsible cuz she did this AFTER she hung up mad at ME!

She wants kids, she wants stability and wants to be loved and be loved back but KNOWS she wont get the last part!

She's already changing her personal info even tho she isnt married yet shes changed her info to his last name!!!

She... i cant take it anymore.... if there's a wedding (sounds like it) i cant go and watch that, and i dont know if i can be apart of her life after that...

only one question left...WHY??? So many
'why's?' why didnt somebody else help her give her another good voice, why didnt even a decent guy find her and make her feel better about herself and crave a GOOD LIFE!?!?!

WHY was i on my own and so was she?

WHY couldnt i save her!?!?

Why couldnt anybody help her off this path?


I'll life is okay, ill never make her mistakes, ill have a good life, but she never will...unless something miraculous happens...

She in a very big way, saved, improved and gave so much to my life. And in 5 years i couldnt repay her properly.

in 5 years LIFE and chance couldnt help her out one time. just 1 act, just one good guy, just 1 of my efforts, just 1 thing...not 1 thing showed up, happened or helped...

No wonder she gave wonder she felt so wonder she thinks this is all she can get and i settling...

So somebody falls in every way possible in life, and nothing happens to help them...

Im so sick of people saying lifes a bitch. No. Thats not it. People who virtually have everything good have a great thing happen to them, and somebody whos crying out for help gets none....

ANd i feel responsible... Advice
You should feel responsible... but not for the problems that have arisen. You are responsible for keeping her from doing worse. And, believe me, she could have done worse in this life.

One last thing you should do just to ease your conscience, and that is to call her and make sure she understands that you do care for her still. Try to suck it up and go to her wedding. After all, life may be bad, but you can still take the opportunity to make it better. She is making a mistake, but out of mistakes can still come good. It seems unlikely in this case, but that shouldn't stop you from trying. I know you are in a deep depression, but if you still want to help her you should dig your way out and continue to support her. You never know what might happen.

Best wishes and good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

Add RomanceClass  to Twitter Add RomanceClass  to Facebook Add RomanceClass  to MySpace Add RomanceClass  to Digg RomanceClass+ Add RomanceClass  to Yahoo My Web Add RomanceClass  to Google Bookmarks Add RomanceClass  to Stumbleupon Add RomanceClass  to Reddit

Speak Your Mind - Share your Thoughts on this Question!

All Advice in the category - General Dating

Browse our Answer Database
- Browse Answers by Question Category
- Browse Answers by Age Group
- Browse Answers by Date of Response

Please read through the advice on this site before you Submit your Own Question! We have thousands of pages of valuable advice that can immediately help you with your situation.