not again

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
i'm friends with this girl who i feel like i have everything in common with. i wasn't sure how i felt about her so i asked her out to dinner and we had a great time. the problem is that she likes one of my best friends. i knew she liked him when i asked her to dinner. he and i talked about it in october and he said that he knew she liked him but he just wantd to hang out. before she said yes to dinner she asked im if it was okay. soon after he sent me a message and he's been furious with me ever since but he told her it was fine with him for us to go. then that weekend they started dating. i havn't told her about anythin he's said accept that he's mad at me. i feel like she and i are a perfect match. he doesn't like a lot of the things that she and i do. i don't want to cause problems for them but his timing seemed realy weird with some of the things he siad to me and i know that he's capable of doing things just to hurt someone. i'm sure thats not his only reason but this is the second time they've dated and i know the things he said about her the last time they dated. i liked her before he did and he asked me if it was okay the 1st time and i stepped aside but i remember how he treated her then and the things he said to her and it hurt me then. all along i've said i'm gonna take things slow and do it the right way but should i tell her how i feel cause even if she and i don't date i want us to be close because of how much of the same stuff we like or should i just try and wait it out?. i don't wan him to tear her down the way i've seen him do to girls in the past. do you think i'm acting aarogant and i'm just telling myself things to feel better? Advice
You are in a tough situation.

You like a girl but she likes another guy and he is upset because you asked her out for dinner.

My advice is to do what you suggested: wait it out.

In some cases it might be ok to continue to hang out with her as friends, but your buddy seems too tempermental for this.

My guess is that she will find him to be unpleasant and will become available to you pretty soon.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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