Friends of the opposite sex

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
My girlfriend of over a year wants to start hanging out with a guy (we'll call him Joe) she used to know. This guy happens to be best friends with an ex-boyfriend, but when they broke up she continued her friendship with Joe. Joe had gone through a divorce at one point and she was there for moral support for him. Along I come and we start dating. She mentioned Joe once about a year and a half ago, but never since. All of a sudden I find out that he has been texting her and emailing her off and on the whole time we have been together. Her explaination is that she didn't want me to get weird because she was talking to a guy that I didn't know. Now, she wants to start hanging out with him out of the blue. I told her that I was very uncomfortable with the idea, but she is very adamant about it. I tried to compromise by asking that instead of going to his house to hang out, that she has him drive the 45 minutes here to meet in a public setting. She declined to do this. When I asked her if it was ok if I meet him first, she said "No, I want time to catch up with him and I don't want it to seem weird that I have to bring my BF along to meet a friend." She insists that it is not that I will never get to meet him, just not until after they have hung out a few times. What do I do? Advice
What can you do? You just bite your tongue and live with it.

Not a pleasant situation, but she seems determined on having it her way. You could break up with her if you can't stand it.

If this leads to a break up, be happy it happened sooner than later when you might have been closer.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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