I'm married and I think I want to leave my husband for my ex!
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
"bill" and i dated for 2 years. we were even engaged at one point. bill and i were on our third breakup when i met "jake", one drunken evening at the bar. by january, i was pregnant by jake. i still wanted to be with bill! but felt obliged by the pregnancy to be with jake. jake and i married in april, and in august, our son was born. about 3 months later, i contacted bill. just to see if he would talk to me. he did. and we've been talking-just as friends-ever since. it kills me still to hear him talk of his relationships and how he made the biggest mistake of his life letting me go, and all that. it's been 2 years since we started talking. my husband doesn't know. i don't know what to do. my marriage is not by any means what i want, by now i have not one, but two children, and jake and i fight quite often. to be honest, jake isn't a good father or a good husband. sometimes things are so bad between us, we go months without sex or even kissing. i feel so trapped. i want to go back to bill, and he says he'd gladly take me back, but am i feeling this way because of bill? are my unsettled emotions the cause of my unhappy marriage? should i divorce jake and go back to bill? would i be unhappy with him as well? i'm so confused. i love both bill and jake! should i stop talking to bill?
First thing to do is to find a professional counselor who can help you through this troublesome situation. It would be better to go alone at first and then add your husband if the counselor suggests it.
The concerns you raised are quite valid and shows you are seriously considering all sides of the situation. You need someone to talk this through with you. A counselor is the right person.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com