logo


Romantic Forums! Get the answers you seek quickly and easily! If you can't find what you need
here amongst our tens of thousands of tips and questions, be sure to Post in our Romantic Forum!
We've got over 9,800 members ready to give you a hand!
A Love Quote
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself. Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love.--Kahlil Gibran



I don't want to hurt her



Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I've been with my girlfriend for 10 months, but I have been feeling lately that I don't want to be in the relationship anymore. She is caring, and we get along ok most of the time, but I'm not in love with her. And now that we have been together for a long time I don't think my feelings will change. But I care about her, and I can't imagine being able to break up with her. I've had depression, and haven't had many friends around recently, so my ending my relationship with her seems so impossible, as she has been so good to me.

I'm 18, and this is my first relationship. And we've been together for quite a long time. I have no experience of anything like this. I am in a difficult situation. It's kind of a long distance relationship, as I don't see her at all during the week. She lives about 3 hours away, and comes down to stay the weekend every couple of weeks on the train. So If I were to break up face to face, it would have to be when she was staying at my house for the weekend. It would have be at the trainstation, after she has traveled 3 hours to get to me, and would have to travel 3 hours back on her own on the next train, and I want to do it somewhere private. But I couldn't do it on the sunday, after I've been normal around her, and shared a bed for the weekend. I would really want to do it somewhere she feels safe, like where she lives, but if I called and arranged to go meet her, she'd want to know why, and it would turn into a break up over the phone.

I also have no idea what to say. I have been trying to imagine the conversation, and I can't. I've never been in a relationship, not even for a week, and this has been 10 months. There hasn't been any event or development that warrants me ending the relationship now, I just don't feel as strongly as I should about her, and don't think I will really love her. This will seem completely out of the blue to her. Although I'm not satisfied with the relationship, there hasn't been any problems. I don't want to hurt her. So how do I break up with her?

I need help soon, thankyou.

(sorry, I tried to keep it as short as possible)




RomanceClass.com Advice
There is a reasonably good chance she knows what is on your mind. Since you are close it may not come as a surprise to her. She may even feel the same.

However, you can't be sure of that so give her the news very gently. My suggestion is to blame the long-distance aspect of your relatiionship. Say that it is difficult to maintain the feelings when you are separated so much.

You might want to tell her about two hours before she leaves. This will give you some time to discuss the situation without making it awkward as would happen if you were to tell her at the beginning of the weekend.

What you should hope for is that you can give her the message in a caring, clear manner so that she more fully understands what you are feeling and she won't have that terrible feeling of not knowing why things have changed.

Good luck! George



-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





Add RomanceClass  to Twitter Add RomanceClass  to Facebook Add RomanceClass  to MySpace Add RomanceClass  to Del.icio.us Digg RomanceClass+ Add RomanceClass  to Yahoo My Web Add RomanceClass  to Google Bookmarks Add RomanceClass  to Stumbleupon Add RomanceClass  to Reddit
 


Speak Your Mind - Share your Thoughts on this Question!

All Advice in the category - Breakup Issues

Browse our Answer Database
- Browse Answers by Question Category
- Browse Answers by Age Group
- Browse Answers by Date of Response



Please read through the advice on this site before you Submit your Own Question! We have thousands of pages of valuable advice that can immediately help you with your situation.
Advertisement


Sparkly Irridescent Glitz Gel

Going to a party or special event? What to feel special no matter what you're doing? Roll on some glitz! Perfect for adding a special bit of sparkle to your day or evening.

Buy Glitz Gel at EclecticLady.com




Bookmark this site so you can reference it any time you need romantic / relationship info in the future!

Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Twitter Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Facebook Add Romance+Class+Website+ to MySpace Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Del.icio.us Digg Romance+Class+Website+ Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Yahoo My Web Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Google Bookmarks Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Stumbleupon Add Romance+Class+Website+ to Reddit


 

Follow Me on Pinterest


Romantic Tshirts, Bags, Mugs and More!

Love is Patient
Love is Patient ...
Deeply Loved
Deeply Loved ...
Random Kindness
Random Kindness ...

These are just a small selection - Visit the RomanceClass Shop!

Join This Newsletter!


 
RomanceClass on Facebook




Join This Newsletter!

Past Issues





| About RomanceClass | Advertising | Privacy Policy | Submit a Suggestion |
All content copyright 2013 Minerva WebWorks LLC. All rights reserved.

this site is for amusement only - professional advice is not being rendered

Irish Wedding