She's Emotionally Cheating on Me
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
We've been together 6.5 years - 2.5 years ago she started talking on the phone, texting and hanging out with a guy that I didn't know. I confronted her and she lied about it - until she finally had to come out with the truth. She claims she never had sex with him, but who knows. A few months later, I found pictures of her dancing very sexily with yet another guy - but she claimed that was just the way she dances. Okay, so we moved on from that - and were happy up until yesterday. I found text messages discussing phone sex on her phone with her ex boyfriend. Now, we live in another state, so I know this time she's not physical with him but I also know that those sort of text messages are not okay. We own a house together and have built a wonderful life and now she's saying that she wants to know what it's like to be single but yet doesn't want to lose me. I'm hurt and very angry and I don't know if I can trust her anymore. What do we do?
Get to a professional couples therapist as fast as possible.
You and she have identified the problem very clearly... she wants to know what it's like to be single without losing you.
Only a therapist can help you work this through.
Good luck! George
p.s. her feelings are not unusual.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com