We're not Perfectly Matched, What should we Do?
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
I am presently involved in a long distance relationship with a man 10 years my junior. We initially met over the phone because he worked for a law firm I dealt with on a daily basis which threw us into a daily work relationship which seemed to spark an interest for both of us as we would sometimes fill time waiting with daily tidbits of each others lives.
I am married and was contemplating leaving my marriage after many years of feeling like "is this all there is", dealingwith an empty nest etc.....I did leave the marriage but the divorce is not yet final...I have developed a very strong bond with this younger man who treats me most of the time like a princess...
We have met and lived together for a few months. I went back east and am originally from the west and returned home after deciding I needed the support of friends and family. I am having a major problem in the relationship due to the fact that he is younger and upon my query admitted he would someday like to have children. I am unable to have children upon which he stated well if it happened for him it happened. I am not sure if it is a big deal for him as he states he is with me for the long haul and is willing to relocate to be closer to me.
I wonder if I am setting myself up for a major heartache when and if he meets someone closer to his age that might be a more suitable match. This could happn in any relationship and we have never discussed marriage..Are there statistics regarding this type of situation that might help me hve a clearer view of what may be in store down the road ? Please advise...thank you !
If every couple that was not perfectly matched called it quits, there would be nobody left! People date people who are heavier than they would like, skinnier than they would like, hairier than they would like, older than they would like, have more kids than they would like, have less kids than they would like, you name it. In the grand scale of things you guys are relatively close together!!
Sure, he's younger. LOTS of couples have one person younger than the other! If he wants to be with you, and you with him, then it'll work. If he's the type to jump ship as soon as something else comes along, it wouldn't have to be younger. It could be older or sexier or smarter or richer or who knows what. So to say "Well these are my flaws", so could every single woman on the planet.
If you guys are really happy together, then give it your best shot. You can get a dog and be amazingly content. Statistics actually show that kids tend to make a couple less happy because of all the fighting that goes on regarding the kids, so you could in fact be far happier than you would have been if kids were involved.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com