I'm Not his Wife, I'm his Possession
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I'm 25 and I got married 3 months ago and my problem is my husband is jealous all the time, he won't let me go out with my friends. He says he doesn't want his wife going out drinking. At our wedding I was dancing with my male friends and when he saw us he dragged me away and said you only dance with me now. You can't dance with no one else only your family.
I am getting on the verge of leaving. Is there anything I can do cos I don't want to give up after just 3 months?
This is incredibly unhealthy of him. A normal woman has male friends to keep her a rounded person. It sounds like he's incredibly insecure and feels that if he doesn't lock you up in an ivory tower that you will "of course" cheat on him. What's next, a gigantic black robe with little eye-slits so that nobody can see you either?
I would run, not walk, to your local therapist and set up a session for you three to talk. Explain what is going on. Your husband can explain why he is so insanely jealous. The therapist can try to explain to your husband that you are not his property - you are his wife that he should support as being a fully functional human being. You agreed to be his partner in life, not his slave.
If he refuses to go to therapy then I would draw the line. There's no way you can live with him being your dominator - and he will only get worse over time as you "settle into the role".
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com