Getting Him Back
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I've been dating this guy for 3 years on and off. We just broke up 2 weeks ago and I still want him. I had him come to talk to me but I was too afraid that he wouldn't want to work things out. This isn't the first time he got mad about this. What should I do to get him back?
I'm not sure I understand what he got mad about. He got mad that you wanted him back? That seems an awfully strange thing to get mad about. Most people would be happy to know someone cares for them, even if they don't return the affection.
In any case, relationships are about being open and honest and communicating. You have to be able to talk to him even if it's about a topic that would upset him - and he has to be able to talk to you even if he's angry! If he's having anger problems so that you're *afraid* to talk to him, something is really wrong. You should NOT be afraid of talking to your partner, especially someone you've dated for three years.
Try again. Have dinner at your place, something you both enjoy, and then sit down together afterwards and talk about things. Explain how you feel, ask how he feels. If he gets angry, he has to learn how to handle his anger and still talk about the situation. If you're saying he yells and screams, well, he has to learn pretty quickly not to. If he's been yelling at you for three years, it might be time for a therapist or priest or someone to sit down with you two and find better ways of dealing with issues. Yelling and screaming is NOT a normal part of a healthy relationship.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com