Meeting up with my ex in another week, how should i react?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Me and my ex starting dating around Feb early this year and got together in May, she then went to Switzerland to further her studies in July. I truly understand that we didnt have a strong foundation yet and this turned to a Long Distance Relationship(LDR)
Problems start occuring, we had time gap and distance, the only way we talked is through phone and skype and smses. More and more disappointment built up due to the times when she needed to talk to me and i couldnt give her.
Until November, she started treating me cold, calls me less and the smses she sent is shorter than last time, this is the time she said i lost part of her, or in another way of saying she loves me less. The problems somehow accumulated. All she could say was she needed time, doesnt feel like talking yet, she used to talk to me alot when she face problems, and wats with the sudden of needing space right?
I couldnt take it anymore and too angry coz i feel less needed now. I made a very harsh decision and that is to breakup even though i couldnt have waited for her to come back first b4 making such decision, by the way shes coming back in 4 weeks.
During the day we broke up, i was too sad so i called her back and ask her can we treat this as a temporally breakup? She said No! So i ask her then you want to treat this as a permenant breakup? she said she cant decide but she'll see me in December and we'll talk things out. What exactly does she mean by she cant decide anyway?
2 weeks later after the breakup she called me, but we didnt talk much, she said she wasnt suppose to talk, just to see how am i doing. But i took the chance to again ask her, have you fully given up on this relationship? she said dont know. I was again stucked by an answer like that, i needed a more reliable answer, yes or no.
4 weeks is almost over now, i'm going to meet her up in less than a week time. The biggest problem now is how should i react? My feelings for her is still very strong, is there a way to convince her to give us another chance to mend things up when i see her?
I dont want to waste this golden opportunity. Furthermore, i dont think she has fully given up on this relationship, because she could have said that we dont have to meet anymore. She can even say yes, i have fully given up on this relationship instead of i dont know. I need help on trying to convince her please...
I think that if she planned on completely breaking up with you, she would have told you by now.
So she probably is willing to try to make the relationship work. You have to convince her that it is worth a try. Be open and honest with her and let her know that your feelings for her are strong.
Take her out for a nice dinner when she returns and see what develops.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com