Going On with Life after a Spouse Cheats
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
My wife cheated on me, and now she says she isn't any more, but I find it really hard to trust her now.
The core of any relationship is trust and honesty. If that trust and honesty is shattered, it can easily take years to rebuild it, and it's a lot of hard work. It's no wonder you're finding this difficult - many relationships do not survive betrayal. This is a person you've pledged to be with through thick and thin, and she broke that trust.
You may not have considered going to a therapist before, but give it some thought. What you're attempting to do - heal the wounds caused by a betrayal of a wife - is really difficult. A therapist is trained to work through these sorts of wounds and find a way to heal them. They have training in rebuilding trust. You could find even a short time with a therapist to be *very* valuable in dealing with the hurt and building a new relationship with your wife.
You should also look at your library or on Amazon.com for books on the topic. It's much harder to do it "on your own" with a book, but if you can't get to a therapist for some reason, that could at least help.
In the end, honesty is THE most important thing in a relationship. If you just keep living with someone you don't trust, it will not only damage you, but it will damage her too, because she's living with someone who doesn't trust or believe in her. So it's really important to work on this!
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com