Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
My finace and i have a long distance relationship, the kind that we have not seen each other for about a year. We talk to each other every single day. He always tells me how much he loves me and he knows how much i love him. However, he spends all his free time in the chat rooms. I have told him that i do not like this but he alwaystellsme he does this because he is alone, healso has told me that he does not PM with anyone. He has even given me his password to his nickname. But in several occasions i have seen the Pms the women send him which includes messages that show a very close relationship and when i confronted him first he got upset and then he told me it does not mean anything to him and that it is not his fault that people take his sense of humor and frindship a wrong way. Even in public chat rooms i've noticed that he actively seeks attention. I do love him very much and since we are not together i do not want to judge him but the fact that he talks to other women like this bothers me. I want to marry him but with this things happening i'm about to change my mind. He always tells me that if he wanted to cheat on me he would go out and be with someone instead of sitting by the computer. please tell me if i'm wrong and he really does not mean anything. Because it seems to me that he suffers from some kind of psychological problem to seek all the attention and if he is telling me the truth, rejecting them, By the way he never tell those people that he is engaged.
As you said, he seems to crave attention because he is lonely.
You two must have a plan where you will get together physically since you call him your fiance. My advice is to do the fiance in person as soon as possible.
As you have experienced, it is very difficult to know and understand someone from afar. Why not just do it... get together?
It is better to find out sooner than later if this relationship is meant to be.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com